• If you are having problems logging in please use the Contact Us in the lower right hand corner of the forum page for assistance.

3-year-old tells all from his mother's restroom stall.

BRG

Well-known member
3-year-old tells all from his mother's restroom stall.

>

>By Shannon Popkin

>

>My little guy, Cade, is quite a talker. People often comment on how clearly

>he speaks for a just-turned- 3-year-old. And you never have to ask him to

>turn up the volume. It's always fully cranked. There've been several

>embarrassing times that I've wished the meaning of his words would have

>been

>masked by a not-so-audible voice, but never have I wished this more than

>last week at Costco.

>

>Halfway, through our shopping trip, nature called, so I took Cade with me

>into the restroom. If you'd been one of the ladies in the restroom that

>evening, this is what you would have heard coming from the second to the

>last stall:

>

>'Mommy, are you gonna go potty? Oh! Why are you putting toiwet paper on the

>potty, Mommy? Oh! You gonna sit down on DA toiwet paper now? Mommy, what

>are

>you doing? Mommy, are you gonna go stinkies on the potty?' At this point I

>started mentally counting how many women had been in the bathroom when I

>walked in. Several stalls were full ... 4? 5? Maybe we could wait until

>they

>all left before I had to make my debut out of this stall and reveal my

>identity. Cade continued, 'Mommy, you ARE going stinkies aren't you? Oh,

>dats a good girl, Mommy! Are you gonna get some candy for going stinkies on

>the potty? Let me see doze stinkies, Mommy! Oh ... Mommy! I'm trying to see

>in dere. Oh! I see dem. Dat is a very good girl, Mommy. You are gonna get

>some candy!

>

>I heard a few faint chuckles coming from the stalls on either side of me.

>Where is a screaming new born when you need her? Good grief. This was

>really

>getting embarrassing. I was definitely waiting a long time before exiting.

>

>Trying to divert him, I said, 'Why don't you look in Mommy's purse and see

>if you can find some candy. We'll both have some!' 'No, I'm trying to see

>doze more stinkies. Oh! Mommy!' He started to gag at this point. 'Uh oh,

>Mommy. I fink I'm gonna frow up. Mommy, doze stinkies are making me frow

>up!! Dat is so gross!!' As the gags became louder, so did the chuckles

>outside my stall. I quickly flushed the toilet in hopes of changing the

>subject. I began to reason with myself: OK. There are four other toilets.

>If

>I count four flushes, I can be Reasonably assured that those who overheard

>this embarrassing monologue will be long gone. 'Mommy! Would you get off

>the

>potty, now? I want you to be done going stinkies! Get up! Get up!' He

>grunted as he tried to pull me off. Now Ic ould hear full-blown laughter. I

>bent down to count the feet outside my door. 'Oh, are you wooking under

>dere, Mommy? You wooking under DA door? What were you wooking at, Mommy?

>You

>wooking at the wady's feet?' More laughter. I stood inside the locked door

>and tried to assess the situation. 'Mommy, it's time to wash our hands,

>now.

>We have to go out now, Mommy.' He started pounding on the door. 'Mommy,

>don't you want to wash your hands? I want to go out!!' I saw that my 'wait

>'em out' plan was unraveling. I sheepishly opened the door, and found

>standing outside my stall, twenty to thirty ladies crowded around the

>stall,

>all smiling and starting to applaud. My first thought was complete

>embarrassment, then I thought, 'Where's the fine print on the motherhood

>contract' where I signed away every bit of my dignity and privacy?' But as

>my little boy gave me a big, cheeky grin while he rubbed bubbly soap

>between

>his chubby little hands, I thought, I'd sign it all away again, just to be

>known as Mommy to this little fellow.
 

feeder

Well-known member
That was precious BRG!!! Also nice to see you around TTB. I have been thinking I might have missed your posts or you were extra busy and not on here much lately.
 
Top