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A (LONG) story to go with Jassy's Snapper.

burnt

Well-known member
B66Snappin-Turtle_edited-1.jpg

Snapping Turtle..

Jassy's picture of the snapper brought to mind a recent event here that will surely go down as a classic.

Our middle son, his girlfriend and a couple of their buddies broke out the canoe and got it wet a couple of weeks ago. I told them you guys are gonna have to carry it a lot cuz the river's too low already.

Nope, they said, there's lots of water yet, it's only April.

No matter, I said, cuz it's just plain dry. Don't go scrapin' over the rocks in my canoe.

Nope, they said, don't worry, there's lotsa water.

Well they put in a few miles up the road from town and planned to paddle those canoes back to town(his buddy brought one too) and sure nuf they didn't have to go far to find out the old man knew a bit about how no spring rains makes for a low river.

No Problem. They just get out at the shallows and portage a bit and put back in. That's why we wear old sneakers or sandals for canoeing - doesn't matter if we jump out and get'em wet.

Well not far from the shore they spied a big old snapper and when they offer it the end of a paddle it obliges by biting on and not letting go. I mean not letting go AT ALL and they drag it into the canoe where it lets go and hitches a ride.

So what do we do with a snapper in the canoe? They were thinkin' unpleasant thoughts about getting their toes nipped off. Sandals don't give much protection for your toes, y'know.

So they fenced it in to the middle of the canoe with the life jackets that weren't needed very badly anyway. Hard to float in only a foot or two of water so they might save your life from a snapper, right? Well, MAYBE!

Since my son was sitting in the back of the canoe, his buddy, Andrew, solemnly warned him to make sure their hitchhiker didn't crawl out of his "prison" and sneak up and bite him from behind.

Well as luck would have it, soon thereafter they had to get out and carry around another shallow spot. They bumped and struggled through the brushy bank and put in on the other side of the bare rocks.

Andrew, being up front, jumped in as soon as they hit deeper water with our boy pushing out a bit further before he jumps in back.

But Andrew barely gets his butt on the seat when he ROCKETS back out of the canoe with a blood curdling yell. Jonathan, he yells, you were supposed to watch my back so the turtle doesn't get me.

Here the turtle had wriggled forward through the "barricade" and as soon as Andrew sat down, the snapper reached or lunged up and bit him on the backside, leading to a rather hasty ejection of the unsuspecting rider.

And that was the end of the snapper's ride as well, he found himself deposited on the nearest piece of dry land. After that, they allowed no more hitchhikers and finished their ride without further incident.

When we finally regained control of our paroxysms of laughter after they told us the story, it was decided that, in keeping with some native traditions, such a momentous event called for a renaming of the hero, or in this case, "victim".

What a challenge, since the unique nature of the event and point of injury lent themselves to some interesting possibilities!

Like, really, how slow does one have to be to get bit in the butt by a turtle? How does one explain to the doctor the reason for the red mark in the shape of a turtle "beak"? He said there was no mark but wouldn't show us :roll: .

Turtlebutt? Fansnapperastic? Beakbutt?

Well we ended up with the rather lame name of "SnapperAndy". Not very descriptive, but it elicits the story every time. And here we thought the biggest danger was the low water!
 

leanin' H

Well-known member
Between pepper sprayin' over protective mother bovines and catassropies with turtles, Ya'll have given me a wheelbarrow load of inspiration for cowboy poetry. I plan to change the names to protect the cow and the turtle. :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: GREAT STORIES!!! :lol:
 

Jassy

Well-known member
I can clearly visualize through your story telling...to funny! I don't trust a snapper at all! That's why I love zoom on a camera and don't have to get close at all..lol
 

balestabber

Well-known member
http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/environment/2009-07-19-turtle-hunt_N.htm

hope this works!in iowa i have seen pick-up loads of turtles harvested.75 cents a pound.some large ones up to 35 pounds. i just found it interesting.and thought i would pass it along.
 

Faster horses

Well-known member
I've never eaten turtle, nor do I plan to; but when we were in Wyoming,
we had some irrigated hay meadows and we had an irrigator. We got him from the Ritz Hotel in Sheridan, Wyoming. That's what you did in those days, went to the Ritz to see who was available. Well, this particular irrigator worked for us several summers. Until the Sheridan, Wyo Rodeo, that is. He always had to go the rodeo. He'd get drunk and not come back;
but by then we could handle the irrigating ourselves. This one year,
he left and I didn't go check out the bunkhouse until our hunters from
Washington showed up to hunt...they cleaned the bunkhouse...and they
found turtle meat in the refrigerator that had been unplugged. Oh, mercy,
was that ever bad!!!!!!! We threw out the turtle meat, and the refrigerator.
Maybe that's why I never have been too interested in eating turtle. YUK!!
 

Big Muddy rancher

Well-known member
Faster horses said:
I've never eaten turtle, nor do I plan to; but when we were in Wyoming,
we had some irrigated hay meadows and we had an irrigator. We got him from the Ritz Hotel in Sheridan, Wyoming. That's what you did in those days, went to the Ritz to see who was available. Well, this particular irrigator worked for us several summers. Until the Sheridan, Wyo Rodeo, that is. He always had to go the rodeo. He'd get drunk and not come back;
but by then we could handle the irrigating ourselves. This one year,
he left and I didn't go check out the bunkhouse until our hunters from
Washington showed up to hunt...they cleaned the bunkhouse...and they
found turtle meat in the refrigerator that had been unplugged. Oh, mercy,
was that ever bad!!!!!!! We threw out the turtle meat, and the refrigerator.
Maybe that's why I never have been too interested in eating turtle. YUK!!


How did you know it was turtle meat?

Was it green? :lol: :lol: :lol:
 

burnt

Well-known member
Jassy said:
I can clearly visualize through your story telling...to funny! I don't trust a snapper at all! That's why I love zoom on a camera and don't have to get close at all..lol

Last spring I was fixing the creek fence where it got pulled down by the spring runoff (which we didn't get this year!) and was splashing across the creek in my rubber boots.

Got to the other side and was working away at pulling wire out of the dead grass along the bank when all of a sudden this big "rock" right in front of my face just got up off the bank and swam away.

Freaked me right out. I don't mind snappers as long as I know they are there but this one really surprised me.

When I was a kid, we used to offer them a stick to see how strong their jaws are. They can munch through a pretty big stick when they are fully grown. :shock:
 

balestabber

Well-known member
i have only tasted turtle.i am not real fond of them but find them interesting.
did u know that turtle eggs will bounce like a supper ball?

and u can swing one around and around to make it dizzy and disoriented and it will instinctively turn around with its nose pointed and go to the nearest water.

also turtle eggs are suppose to be more of a delacacy than the meat.

just some more thoughts--------enjoy
 

RobinFarmandRanch

Well-known member
Faster horses said:
YOU....HAVE....GOT...TO....BE.....KIDDING!!!! :shock: :p

Ohh not at all. biggest one ive ever caught was with my late dad. he showed my how to pick them up without being bitten. That one weight right at 68 lbs.

they are hard to clean, but well worth it in the end.

Now is the time to catch them too. Frogging season is closed till June 1st. :twisted:
 

the_jersey_lilly_2000

Well-known member
Yes I knew they bounce like rubber balls. Or rather pingpong balls. Ran over a loggerhead (snapper) one time in my jeep. Looked in the rear view mirror afterwards, and there were white balls bouncin everwhere. So had to back up so the kiddos could look at em. LOL
 
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