• If you are having problems logging in please use the Contact Us in the lower right hand corner of the forum page for assistance.

American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada

Goodpasture

Well-known member
From the Manitoba Herald, Canada (a very underground paper):


The flood of American liberals sneaking across the border into Canada has intensified in the past week, sparking calls for increased patrols to stop the illegal immigration.

The actions of President Bush are prompting the exodus among left-leaning citizens who fear they'll soon be required to hunt, pray,
and agree with Bill O'Reilly.

Canadian border farmers say it's not uncommon to see dozens of sociology professors, animal-rights activists and Unitarians crossing their fields at night. "I went out to milk the cows the other day, and there was a Hollywood producer huddled in the barn," said Manitoba farmer Red Greenfield, whose acreage borders North Dakota. The producer was cold, exhausted and hungry. "He asked me if I could spare a latte and some free-range chicken." When I said I didn't have any, he left. Didn't even get a chance to show him my screenplay, eh?"

In an effort to stop the illegal aliens, Greenfield erected higher fences, but the liberals scaled them. So he tried installing speakers that blare Rush Limbaugh across the fields. "Not real effective," he said. "The liberals still got through, and Rush annoyed the cows so much they wouldn't give milk."

Officials are particularly concerned about smugglers who meet liberals near the Canadian border, pack them into Volvo station wagons, drive them across the border and leave them to fend for themselves.

"A lot of these people are not prepared for rugged conditions," an Ontario border patrolman said. "I found one carload without a drop of drinking water. "They did have a nice little Napa Valley cabernet, though."

When liberals are caught, they're sent back across the border, often wailing loudly that they fear retribution from conservatives. Rumors have been circulating about the Bush administration establishing re-education camps in which liberals will be forced to drink domestic beer and watch NASCAR races.

In recent days, liberals have turned to sometimes-ingenious ways of crossing the border. Some have taken to posing as senior citizens on bus trips to buy cheap Canadian prescription drugs. After catching a half-dozen young vegans disguised in powdered wigs, Canadian immigration authorities began stopping buses and quizzing the supposed senior-citizen passengers on Perry Como and Rosemary Clooney hits to prove they were alive in the '50s. "If they can't identify the accordion player on The Lawrence Welk Show, we get suspicious about their age," an official said.

Canadian citizens have complained that the illegal immigrants are creating an organic-broccoli shortage and renting all the good Susan Sarandon movies.

"I feel sorry for American liberals, but the Canadian economy just can't support them," an Ottawa resident said. "How many art-history majors does one country need?"

Stolen from another forum..............
 

Liberty Belle

Well-known member
Good one, Goodpasture! My Canadian brother-in-law sent this to me last year as he and my sister were in the process of moving to the US.

He told me there are WAY too many liberals in Ontario for his taste and he wanted outta there before they corrupted him!
 

Mrs.Greg

Well-known member
:D By the pic in another thread of the red head in the pink bikini,it looks like we already have the most liberal of liberal Americans working in our country :wink:

Ontario is full of liberals,same with Quebec,our elections are won before they even hit the west,and that is the truth.
 

Juan

Well-known member
Mrs.Greg said:
:D By the pic in another thread of the red head in the pink bikini,it looks like we already have the most liberal of liberal Americans working in our country :wink:

Ontario is full of liberals,same with Quebec,our elections are won before they even hit the west,and that is the truth.

You should see if Montana would annex you but then again the liberals are getting stronger there ! :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:
 
Top