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Bear Story

Juan

Well-known member
Sent: Sunday, November 4, 2007
Subject: BEAR STORY
This Should End All 3 Bears Stories For Good!!!!!
Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table. He looks into his small bowl. It is empty. "Who's been eating my porridge?!!" he squeaks.
Papa Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair.He looks into his big bowl, and it is also empty. "Who's been eating my Porridge?!!" he roars.
Momma Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells "How many times do we have to go through this with you idiots?
It was Momma Bear who got up first; it was Momma Bear who woke everyone in the house up., it was Momma Bear who made the coffee, it was Momma Bear who unloaded the dishwasher, and put everything away, it was Momma Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper, it was Momma Bear who set the damn table, it was Momma Bear who put the friggin' cat out, cleaned the litter box, and filled the cat's water and food dish, and, now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs, and grace Momma Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence, listen good, cause I'm only going to say this one more time.....
"I HAVEN'T MADE THE @!#$*@! PORRIDGE YET!"
Could this be one of our gang? :D :D :D
 

Kato

Well-known member
An atheist was hiking in the mountains when he met a big grizzly bear. The path was narrow, and there was no escape. As the bear stood up on it's hind legs, and came toward him, the atheist called out, "Please God! Save me!"

All of a sudden, time stopped. The bear froze in place, and a big sunbeam came down from the sky. A booming voice answered, "Why do you say you don't believe in me, and then when you are in trouble, you ask me for help?"

The atheist said, "Sorry God, but I'm desperate! Can't you please help me? I know I'm not a Christian, but maybe you could make the bear into one?"

God thought about it and said "I will grant your request."

"Thank you God!" the atheist replied.

Then God was gone. The bear began to move. He dropped to the ground, and then to his knees.

"Dear God, thank you for the meal I am about to receive."
 
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