Miss Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had
never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him
into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while
she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister
noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!
When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of
water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl.
"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking
through the Park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter."
TWO PRIESTS
Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly gate.
St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys In now, but our computer is down.
You'll have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can't go back as
priests.
What'll it be?"
The first priest says, "I've always wanted to Be an eagle, soaring above
the Rocky Mountains."
"So be it," says St. Peter, and off flies the First priest.
The second priest mulls this over for a moment And asks, "Will any of this
week 'count,' St. Peter?"
"No, I told you the computer's down. There's
No way we can keep track of what you're doing."
"In that case," says the second priest, "I've Always wanted to be a stud."
"So be it" says St. Peter, and the second Priest disappears.
A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to
recall the two priests.
"Will you have any trouble locating them?" He asks.
"The first one should be easy," say! St. Peter.
"He's somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles.
But the second one could prove to be more difficult."
"Why?" asked the Lord.
"He's on a snow tire, somewhere in Alberta."
never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all.
One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him
into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while
she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister
noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom!
When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of
water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl.
"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking
through the Park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter."
TWO PRIESTS
Two priests died at the same time and met Saint Peter at the Pearly gate.
St. Peter said, "I'd like to get you guys In now, but our computer is down.
You'll have to go back to Earth for about a week, but you can't go back as
priests.
What'll it be?"
The first priest says, "I've always wanted to Be an eagle, soaring above
the Rocky Mountains."
"So be it," says St. Peter, and off flies the First priest.
The second priest mulls this over for a moment And asks, "Will any of this
week 'count,' St. Peter?"
"No, I told you the computer's down. There's
No way we can keep track of what you're doing."
"In that case," says the second priest, "I've Always wanted to be a stud."
"So be it" says St. Peter, and the second Priest disappears.
A week goes by, the computer is fixed, and the Lord tells St. Peter to
recall the two priests.
"Will you have any trouble locating them?" He asks.
"The first one should be easy," say! St. Peter.
"He's somewhere over the Rockies, flying with the eagles.
But the second one could prove to be more difficult."
"Why?" asked the Lord.
"He's on a snow tire, somewhere in Alberta."