hypocritexposer
Well-known member
In testimony before the Senate Budget Committee, Department of Homeland Security Secretary Jeh Johnson shocked senators of both parties when he disclosed that it costs between $250 and $1,000 per day per person to house the illegal immigrants that have been surging across our border with Mexico.
"There was an audible gasp, a bipartisan gasp," Senator Marco Rubio (R., Fla.) recounted. "I could take a luxurious Caribbean cruise every day of the year for a lower total cost. I cannot fathom why the spartan accommodations we are providing for these people should cost so much."
Senate Budget Committee chairwoman Patty Murray (D-Wash) questioned the applicability of Rubio's luxury cruise comparison. "While the amount may appear excessive to the untrained observer I'm sure there are unseen factors that we just don't realize," Murray presumed. "If Senator Rubio takes a cruise he makes all his own arrangements and may exert some judgment over whether the expenses are worth it. No such latitude is available for these refugees. Housing them is official government business entailing multiple layers of authority and decision making. Who are we to second guess what they do?"
Senator Jay Rockefeller (D-WV) was one of the few that weren't shocked by the expense. "We pay upwards of $50,000 per year for each prison inmate," he pointed out. "Let's face it, government housing is expensive."
Housing prisoners at $50,000 per inmate per year comes to around $140 per day—far lower than DHS's estimate for housing the immigrants. "You've got to remember that the budgets for prisons aren't arrived at in a panic situation," Johnson said. "There's time to reflect on what might be the most cost-effective methods. The urgency of the immigration crisis eliminates the opportunity to pursue issues of efficiency. It's Congress's duty to appropriate whatever amount the President has requested to handle this emergency."
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi suggested that "the high cost of housing these immigrants could be averted if we make use of the vast inventory of unused housing that exists in this country. How many American families have more room than they need? Can't some of this space be made available on an emergency basis?"
Pelosi said she was unsure of how to make unused housing available but speculated that "President Obama could issue an Executive Order compelling home owners to provide access to their excess capacity. We could look at a home's square footage and number of rooms, compare that to census data on who currently lives there and make a determination of which homes can take in some of the refugees."
The United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees concurred in Pelosi's assessment noting that "the typical American family has far more living room than the refugees that need to be accommodated. Simple equity demands that this excess be shared among these less fortunate people."
In related news, the New York City Council announced it is prepared to grant citizenship to up to 500,000 illegal immigrants. Mayor Bill de Blasio called the passage of this ordinance "a proud day for our City. While Congress may be too indifferent to act in this time of emergency I'm pleased to see that New Yorkers have stepped in to fill the void. And with the documents we will be giving these immigrants there will be nothing to stop them from enjoying the full fruits of living in America no matter where they choose to go."
http://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/159834-2014-07-20-semi-news-a-satire-of-recent-news-july-20-2014.htm