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Fatal things to say to your pregnant wife.

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CattleCo

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Fatal things to say to your pregnant wife.


17. "I finished the Oreo's."

16. "Not to imply anything, but I don't think the kid weighs forty
pounds."

15. "Y'know, looking at her, you'd never guess that Pamela Lee had a
baby."

14. "I sure hope your thighs aren't gonna stay that flabby forever."

13. "Well, couldn't they induce labor? The 25th is the SuperBowl."

12. "Darned if you ain't about five pounds away from a surprise visit
from that Richard Simmons fella."

11. "Fred at the office passed a stone the size of a pea. Boy, that's
gotta hurt."

10. "Whoa! For a minute there, I thought I woke up next to Willard
Scott!"

9. "I'm jealous. Why can't men experience the joy of childbirth?"

8. "Are your ankles supposed to look like that?"

7. "Get your *own* ice cream."

6. "Geez, you're awfully puffy looking today."

5. "Got milk?"

4. "Maybe we should name the baby after my secretary, Tawney."

3. "Man! That rose tattoo on your hip is the size of Madagascar!"

2. "Retaining water ? Yeah, like the Hoover Dam retains water."

And the Number 1 Fatal Thing To Say If Your Wife Is Pregnant...

1. "You don't have the guts to pull that trigger."
 

ranchwife

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this could have been titled "sure fire ways to ensure that you will NOT be around the see the birth of your child" :shock: :shock:
I did like #1, though!!! :wink:
 

Murgen

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this could have been titled "sure fire ways to ensure that you will NOT be around the see the birth of your child"

Or "why you won't be around to conceive the second child"
 

ranchwife

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Murgen said:
this could have been titled "sure fire ways to ensure that you will NOT be around the see the birth of your child"

Or "why you won't be around to conceive the second child"

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
soooooo true!!! i had a friend who gained about 65# with her 3rd child and her hubby made a comment to her one night at a football game about "ya know, the human skin and all it's components can only bounce back into shape so many times before it just gives up".....the look she gave him was enough to send him to meet his maker!!!
 

ranchwife

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Murgen said:
I'm sure he was talking about the leather on the football!

never thought of it that way, murgen!!! However, i am sure i was not the only one...including the "little woman"!!!! Happy ending, though....the hubby is now able to breathe without assistance and the mama should be getting paroled, soon!! :wink: :wink:
 

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