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Big Muddy rancher

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Subject: I cannot accept money



One day a florist goes to a barber for a haircut. After the cut he asked about his bill and the barber replies: "I'm sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing community service this week."

The florist is pleased and leaves the shop. The next morning when the barber goes to open there is a thank you card and a dozen roses waiting for him at his door.

Later, a cop comes in for a haircut, and when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies: "I'm sorry, I cannot accept money; I'm doing community service this week." The cop is happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up there is a thank you card and a dozen donuts waiting for him at his door.

Later Steven Harper comes in for a haircut, and when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies: "I'm sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing community service this week." Steven Harper is very happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open, there is a thank you card and a dozen different books such as "How to Improve Your Business and Becoming More Successful".

Then Paul Martin comes in for a haircut, and when he goes to pay his bill the barber again replies: "I'm sorry, I cannot accept money from you; I'm doing community service this week." Paul Martin is very happy and leaves the shop.

The next morning when the barber goes to open up, there are a dozen Liberals lined up waiting for a free haircut.
 

Manitoba_Rancher

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Big Muddy,


THat is so true. I think after next Monday night Mr Martin may be looking for a new job :wink:
 

DiamondSCattleCo

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Don't get me wrong guys, I'm not a Martin lover, but does anyone really expect any of our options to be all that great?

I mean, we have the Liberal choice. We've seen how that worked out, and with all his US bluster (as a patriot, it is nice to see a politician with a few cojones, but there really isn't much use in ticking off a bear) our cross border relations aren't looking all that great these days.

And we have the NDP choice. Or do we? Do they have a platform at all? All I've heard Layton do is insult the other parties platforms without actually forwarding one of his own. I'm beginning to suspect that NDP stands for No Doggoned Platform.

And of course Harper and the Conservatives. What can I say? Looks like a spendy platform with alot of promises. And if Martin is a little too anti-US, perhaps Harper is a little too pro-US. There is such a thing as being a little too friendly with a country who wants our power, water, and doctors, but doesn't really want our lumber, red spring wheat, or cows. Gotta have a little spine, you know?

Wish we had a western separtist on the ballot. I'd be all over it.

Rod
 

Manitoba_Rancher

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Have you watched any of the debates where Jack Layton ppoints and the camera and says " Jack Layton-NDP".. made me chuckle. None of the parties have really paid any attention to the west or agriculture. They seem to turn a blind eye to us poor folk... :roll:
 

greg

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Have to agree about our choices,not real sure Harpers the guy but what else is there!!! Seriously,do think we need a western party,be it a separest party or not.I would definatly vote for a western party.
 

DJL

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Short of a party that would lead Alberta out of confederation, I don't see much happening that would benefit us. We had Reform, and now they are blended into Conservatives. I hate to hear talk of separation, but I am so tired of being the east' poor country cousin, that it is looking better all the time.
 

PureCountry

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I've mentioned it on here a few times, but I'll bring it up again...DON'T COUNT OUT THE GREEN PARTY!! Greg, in your riding there's a real good candidate...name is Sean Moss, I think. They've got a great platform for agriculture - surprisingly - and are definitely not the tree-huggers I originally took them for. Long story short - take the time to check them out. We called our candidate and invited him for coffee Friday night, along with a bunch of neighbours to drill him with questions. Went really good, and by the time everyone went home he had most of the votes there.

We're voting Green Party, even though there is a Western Separatist candidate to vote for here. I'm not sure about him though. They're actually called the Western Block Party.
 

Shelly

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Do any of you have the Christian Heritage Party running in your constituency? Their slogan is "Vote Against Immorality". The best friend thought it said "Vote For Immortality"! He said they had his vote till I told him what the sign really said. Personally, I think church organizations should stay OUT of politics.
 
A

Anonymous

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Shelly said:
The best friend thought it said "Vote For Immortality"!
I thought it said "Vote for Immorality"!

We have that party in the states...Here its called Democrats :wink:
 

3words

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Shelly said:
Do any of you have the Christian Heritage Party running in your constituency? Their slogan is "Vote Against Immorality". The best friend thought it said "Vote For Immortality"! He said they had his vote till I told him what the sign really said. Personally, I think church organizations should stay OUT of politics.
Shelly,maybe your best friend should get glasses? :wink:
 

DiamondSCattleCo

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cowsense said:
We call ours "New Democrats" :roll: :???:

I've often wondered how long they remain "New" democrats. I mean, my truck is 10 years old, and its an old truck now. So shouldn't they really be changing their name soon?

Rod
 

fedup2

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History began some 12,000 years ago.(Actually, it was 40,000 years ago.) Humans existed as members of small bands of nomadic hunter/gatherers. They lived on deer in the mountains during the summer and would go to the coast and live on fish and lobster in winter.

The two most important events in all of history were the invention of beer and the invention of the wheel. The wheel was invented to get man to the beer. These were the foundations of modern civilization and, together, were the catalyst for the splitting of humanity into two distinct subgroups: Liberals and Conservatives.

Once beer was discovered, it required grain and that was the beginning of agriculture. Neither the glass bottle nor aluminum can was invented yet, so while our early human ancestors were sitting around waiting for them to be invented, they just stayed close to the brewery. That's how villages were formed.

Some men spent their days tracking and killing animals to barbeque at night while they were drinking beer. This was the beginning of what is known as "the Conservative movement."

Other men who were weaker and less skilled at hunting learned to live off the Conservatives by showing up for the nightly barbeques and doing the sewing, fetching and hair dressing. This was the beginning of the Liberal movement. Some of these liberal men eventually evolved into women. The rest became known as girlymen.

Some noteworthy liberal achievements include the domestication of cats, the invention of group therapy, group hugs and the concept of Democratic voting to decide how to divide the meat and beer that Conservatives provided.

Over the years, Conservatives came to be symbolized by the largest, most powerful land animal on earth, the elephant. Liberals are symbolized by the jackass.

Modern Liberals like imported beer (with lime added)(& foo foo coffee), but most prefer white wine or imported, bottled water. They eat raw fish but like their beef well done. Sushi, tofu, and French food are standard Liberal fare.

Another interesting evolutionary side note: Most of their women have higher testosterone levels than their men. Most social workers, personal injury attorneys, journalists, dreamers in Hollywood and group therapists are Liberals. Liberals invented the designated hitter rule because it wasn't "fair" to make the pitcher also bat.

Conservatives drink domestic beer. They eat red meat and still provide for their women. Conservatives are big-game hunters, rodeo cowboys, lumberjacks, construction workers, firemen, medical doctors, police officers, corporate executives, fighter pilots, athletes and generally anyone who works productively outside government. Conservatives who own companies hire other Conservatives who want to work for a living.

Liberals produce little or nothing. They like to "govern" the producers and decide what to do with the production. Liberals believe Europeans are more enlightened than Americans. That is why most of the Liberals remained in Europe when Conservatives were coming to America. They crept in after the Wild West was tame and created a business of trying to get MORE for nothing. :lol:

(feel free to change this to a Canadian story!) :lol:
 

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