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For Wally World Haters

Cowpuncher

Well-known member
When you have nothing else to do:


Dear Mrs. Toombs,

Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Elbert Toombs, has been
causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this type of
behavior and have considered banning the entire family from shopping in
any of our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video
surveillance equipment. Three of our clerks are attending counseling
from the trouble your husband has caused. All complaints against
Mr.Toombs have been compiled and are listed below.

Mr. Wally Zimbrowski,

Wal-Mart Complaint Department

MEMO Re: Mr. Elbert Toombs - Complaints - 15 Things Mr. Toombs has done
while his spouse/partner is shopping:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's
carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of pineapple juice on the floor leading to the
rest rooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone,
'Code 3' in housewares..... and watched what happened.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&Ms on
layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
;

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other
shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding
department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to
cry and asks Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a
mirror, and picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked
the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the
"Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look"
using different size funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through,
yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he
assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices
again!!!!"

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited
awhile; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"

In light of Mr. Toombs status as a retired Federal employee, we are not
contacting the police at this time. However, this behavior must cease
immediately!
 

ranchwife

Well-known member
Mrs.Greg said:
LOL,got a laugh and for some reason reminded me of cowboy-up :???: :lol:

NO DOUBT!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: I can easily picture him doing just these sort of things...except you left out "riding the kids' trikes" (stated "gotta make sure these things work before we take them home"), farting in the grocery sections (usually near the meat department) and telling others "don't go in there, something died", putting his cowboy hat on sideways and acting like someone "developementally challenged" just to embarrass me.....just to name a few!! :shock: :shock:
 

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