"The first debate is tomorrow night and I heard that the Obama campaign is a little worried because during his flight to Nevada on Sunday the president watched four hours of football instead of studying — although it did mark the first time all year that Obama has actually seen something get passed." –Jimmy Fallon
"After months of buildup, last night was the first presidential debate at the University of Denver. Of course, a lot of big names didn't show up to the event -- Joe Biden, Nancy Pelosi, President Obama." -Jimmy Fallon
"As part of the strategy for the upcoming presidential debates, the Obama campaign is attempting to lower expectations. And believe, if there's one thing that President Obama is good at lately, it's lowering expectations." –Jay Leno
"President Obama talked last night about finding new sources of energy. He couldn't muster enough energy for the 90-minute debate. And to make matters worse, last night was his anniversary. The only way his wedding anniversary could have been worse was if he had forgotten it." –Jay Leno
"There are 40 days left until the election. A lot can happen in 40 days -- Obama can make a gaffe, Mitt could win the debates, God can send a flood to destroy all mankind. So, there's hope." –Stephen Colbert
"It's like Obama wasn't even there. He hasn't done this poorly since he debated Clint Eastwood." –Stephen Colbert
"It's being reported that Mitt Romney's goal for tonight's debate is to make Barack Obama look like Jimmy Carter. Meanwhile, Barack Obama's goal is to make Mitt Romney look like Mitt Romney." –Conan O'Brien
"At one point last night President said the one thing about being president is learning to say no -- especially when someone asks, 'Do you feel ready for this debate?'" –Conan O'Brien
"For tomorrow's debate, President Obama's advisers have been working with him to keep his responses short. In fact, the only words the president plans on saying are 'bin Laden' and 'dead.' That's it." –Conan O'Brien
"The President seemed to give long-winded, disjointed answers during last night's debate. Even Gay Busey was like, 'Dude you've got to focus.'" –Conan O'Brien
"The presidential debates begin on Wednesday. Romney has taken two days off to prepare. They're going to have practice debates. They're going to do that for two days, and another full day of spray tanning, and he'll be ready to go." –David Letterman
"Say what you will about Mitt Romney. Less night I thought he was energetic, he was crisp, he was dynamic. What have you done with the real Mitt Romney?" –David Letterman