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Good Laugh

katrina

Well-known member
Have you ever spoken and
>> wished that you could immediately take the words
> back or that you could crawl into a hole ?
>>
>> _____
>>
>> *I was at the golf store
>> comparing different kinds
>> of golf balls.
>> I was unhappy with the women's type
>> I had been using. After browsing for
>> several minutes, I was approached
>> by one of the good- looking gentlemen
>> who works at the store. He asked if
>> he could help me.
>> Without thinking, I looked at him
>> and said,
>> "I think I like playing with men's balls."
>>
>> *My sister and I were at the mall and passed
>> by a store that sold a variety of candy
>> and nuts. As we were looking at
>> the display case, the boy behind
>> the counter asked if we needed
>> any help. I replied,
>> "No, I'm just looking at your nuts."
>> My sister started to laugh hysterically,
>> the boy grinned, and I turned
>> beet-red and walked away.
>> To this day, my sister has never
>> let me forget.
>>
>> *Have you ever asked your child
>> a question too many times?
>> My three-year-old son had a lot
>> of problems with potty training
>> and I was on him constantly.
>> One day we stopped at Taco Bell
>> for a quick lunch in between errands.
>> It was very busy, with a full dining
>> room. While enjoying my taco,
>> I smelled something funny,
>> so of course I checked my
>> seven-month-old daughter,
>> and she was clean.
>> Then I realized that Danny had not
>> asked to go potty in a while,
>> so I asked him if he needed to go,
>> and he said, "No."
>> I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child
>> has had an accident, and I don't
>> have any clothes with me."
>> Then I said,
>> "Danny, are you SURE you didn't
>> have an accident?"
>> "No," he replied. I just KNEW that
>> he must have had an accident,
>> because the smell was getting worse.
>> Soooooo, I asked one more time,
>> "Danny, did you have an accident?"
>> This time he jumped up,
>> yanked down his pants, bent over
>> and spread his cheeks and yelled.
>> "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!"
>> While 30 people nearly choked to
>> death on their tacos laughing,
>> he calmly pulled up his pants and
>> sat down.
>> An old couple made me feel better
>> by thanking me for the best laugh
>> they'd ever had!
>>
>> *This had most of the state of
>> Michigan laughing for 2 days
>> and a very embarrassed female
>> news anchor who will, in the future,
>> likely think before she speaks.
>> What happens when you predict
>> snow but don't get any?
>> A true story. We had a female
>> news anchor who, the day after
>> it was supposed to have snowed
>> and didn't, turned to the
>> weatherman and asked:
>> "So Bob, where's that 8 inches
>> you promised me last night?"
>> Not only did HE have to leave
>> the set, but half the crew did too!
>>
>> While on a flight from New York ,
>> the Stewardess was busy passing
>> out peanuts and cokes to everyone.
>> There were about sixteen flights
>> lined up waiting to get clearance
>> to take off.
>> Then the other Stewardess got a
>> message from the Pilot that the
>> tower said the wind had changed 1
>> 80 degrees and they were first in
>> line to take off, and to have
>> everyone buckle up.
>> Without thinking she just announced
>> "Please buckle up, grab your drinks
>> and hold your nuts, we're taking off!".
>> No one saw her for the rest of the
>> flight to Houston, and all the other
>> Stewardesses were laughing
>> all the way and so were half of
>> the passengers.
>>
>> Now, didn't that feel good ?
>> Pass it on to someone
>> you know who needs
>> a good laugh.
 

Northern Rancher

Well-known member
Nothing worse than those fake snowfalls lol. That stewardess could fly for 'WESTJET' it's the only airline worth flying in Canada-lots of fun flying with them.
 

Judith

Well-known member
This post is even funnier to me as I have had two situations that are...well similar :)

I worked for a large pet supply chain. While helping an elderly gentlemen pick out a pet carrier for his dachshund I said (quite innocently)

"Sir, your weiner will never fit into that bag, it's much too large."

I didn't have a clue what I had said but let me tell you all of the staff within ear shot burst into hysterics!


My other never to be forgotten woops was me leaning over the counter and bellering at a woman "Have a good night, lady!" WHO SAYS THAT !!!!!! To this day I have no idea how that came out of my mouth.

There have been many staff meetings where this farewell has been used as a "what not to do to customers " I felt beyond stupid but heck ya can't take it back can ya :) Trust me you feel even more like a dork when you are the customer services manager...........
 

Judith

Well-known member
Nope not dead :) Just bummed and in hermit mode. Let me get through the audit and stuff and I will get back on that one ASAP :)
 

Cal

Well-known member
We were on one of the double-decker tour busses up around Victoria, just looking out the window. A couple seats over was an older prim and proper couple, and the lady noticed someone outside the bus that had a pretty frizzy hair-do, and she asked "What do you suppose they call that, some sort of blow-job?" We damn near died laughing, and I don't think she had a clue what she said.
 

Faster horses

Well-known member
FUN-NY, Cal!!!!

My big blooper was sorting cattle horseback several years ago.
There were some shorthorn crosses mixed in the bunch and I noticed one
that needed to be gotten out. I said "there's one" and the guy doing
the cutting couldn't see what I was pointing at. He asked me again,
and I said, "There. That SHORTHORNY one."

Never have lived that down to this day.
 
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