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Mayor of the new planet Stupider

Soapweed

Well-known member
http://www.examiner.com/article/pelosi-contempt-vote-plot-to-stop-eric-holder-from-fighting-voter-suppression

Conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh excoriated Pelosi on Thursday, calling her "the mayor of the new planet Stupider."

"We need a new planet. We need a new planet called Stupider, and I need to put Nancy Pelosi on it as the mayor of the whole planet, as the governor, as the evil emperor, whatever," he said.

He added:


"I knew yesterday that it would take a while for these people to come up with an explanation, "Well, it's common. Well, every president does it. Well, this is just a witch hunt." But I never dreamed, because I can't think this stupidly, I never dreamed that the official Democrat Party response would be that the Republicans intend to cheat in the election and Holder was gonna stop 'em, and so Holder has to be stopped because he was gonna stop the cheating."
 

Whitewing

Well-known member
It's almost impossible to parody the left which is why stupid shyte like Borowitz is about all that can be found on the internets.
 

Steve

Well-known member
Borowitz can be funny and worth adding to a thread if it is relevant to the topic..

for instance.. on the scandals..
Obama Asks Staff to Start Cc’ing Him on Stuff

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a dramatic departure from existing White House procedures, President Obama requested today that his staff start cc’ing him on stuff.

“Look, I know a lot of you think I’m really busy and you don’t want to bother me,” the President reportedly told his staff in an Oval Office meeting. “But cc me anyway. It’s good for me to keep up on what’s going on around here.”

“It’s not good when I turn on the news and they’re talking about something at the White House and I’m like, whoa, when did that happen?” Mr. Obama added. “I think cc’ing me would go a long way toward fixing that.”

“Maybe put a Post-It note on your computer saying, ‘CC POTUS,’ so you don’t forget,” he said as the meeting broke up.

Afterward, the President told aides that he “felt really good” about the meeting and was “really looking forward to people looping me in on stuff.”

But Mr. Obama’s mood soured later in the day, sources say, when his e-mail address was left off a message bearing the subject line, “Things the Treasury Dept. Is Planning to Do.”

Mr. Obama hastily reconvened his staff, telling them, “Look, maybe I didn’t make myself clear. That’s just the kind of thing I should have been cc’d on. Even Biden got that one. Could one of you please forward it to me?”

As of press time, Mr. Obama had not yet received the e-mail.

or if you want to mock the republicans and think the scandals are over blown.. this one is relevant..
Republicans Question Whether Obama Could Handle Actual Scandal

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—President Obama’s handling of controversies about the I.R.S., the Justice Department, and Benghazi has raised “grave doubts” about his ability to cope if he ever became involved in an actual scandal, prominent Republicans said today.

“If this is how he handles this stuff, Lord have mercy on him if he ever has to deal with a real scandal,” said newly elected Rep. Mark Sanford (R-S. Carolina). “Quite frankly, I don’t think he has what it takes.”

“The true test of a leader is this,” Rep. Sanford added. “When he gets in a fix, does he have the presence of mind to lie about his whereabouts? Sadly, I don’t think President Obama passes that test.”

Mr. Sanford’s concerns mirror those of another leading Republican lawmaker, Sen. David Vitter (R-Louisiana).

“If President Obama honestly thinks he’s dealing with scandals right now, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know what a scandal is,” Sen. Vitter said. “And that’s very worrisome.”

“When you get that three A.M. phone call, and it’s a reporter claiming that a prostitute said you like to dress up in a diaper, are you prepared for that call?” Sen. Vitter said. “In the case of President Obama, I am afraid that the answer is no.”

then we could counter that humor with this one..
Obama Denies Role in Government

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—President Obama used his weekly radio address on Saturday to reassure the American people that he has “played no role whatsoever” in the U.S. government over the past four years.

“Right now, many of you are angry at the government, and no one is angrier than I am,” he said. “Quite frankly, I am glad that I have had no involvement in such an organization.”

The President’s outrage only increased, he said, when he “recently became aware of a part of that government called the Department of Justice.”

“The more I learn about the activities of these individuals, the more certain I am that I would not want to be associated with them,” he said. “They sound like bad news.”

Mr. Obama closed his address by indicating that beginning next week he would enforce what he called a “zero tolerance policy on governing.”

“If I find that any members of my Administration have had any intimate knowledge of, or involvement in, the workings of the United States government, they will be dealt with accordingly,” he said.

but the liberals on this site can't seem to get their Borowitz reports on topic..

so in a thread about how stupid pissylusi is.. they would continue to show constant scandal Borowitz reports and not understand why conservatives failed to see the humor..

I sure wish this one was on scandal... cause Borowitz seems to be shifting sides these days.. at least the liberals have this one to laugh at.. ...
Republicans Agree to Stop Using Word “Scandal” in Every Sentence If Obama Resigns
 

Steve

Well-known member
sorry for getting so far off topic.. but really pisslucy being stupid isn't really new news.. so I was bored...

sorry..


anyways back to Borowitz
Democrats: Trillions Could Be Added To Budget if We Promote Irresponsibility

Dateline: Washington DC, 7/1/2011 – Andy Borowitz (in delirium)

Today, in a surprise announcement from the House gymnasium floor next to Andrew Weiner’s old locker, House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) proclaimed, “We could have all the money we want to pay off our massive debt if we just print it out of thin air”.

Pelosi triumphantly added, “It worked when I was Speaker and it’ll work now!”

When asked for comment, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) added, “Yeah, and not only that but we’ll impose punitive new taxes on the rich, too. That’ll teach ‘em for creating jobs outside of Nevada and getting rich off it!”

CNN’s Elliot Spitzer on his critically acclaimed show “In the Arena” praised Pelosi’s simple yet elegant solution for solving both the deficit and the debt problems before the looming August 2nd deadline for raising the debt ceiling. “Thank, Gawd!”, he said, “The country is saved!”

During a lively CNN panel discussion that followed it was decided George W. Bush and Republican obstructionism were to blame for everything.

White House Press Secretary, Jay Carney, said President Obama discussed Pelosi’s proposal with Congressional leaders in an afternoon Oval Office meeting but his position, like his views on gay marriage, is still evolving.

Standing just behind Carney at the White House press briefing, the President leaned toward his Chief of Staff, Bill Daley, and whispered, “What do the polls say about Pelosi today?”

Then, after a few awkward seconds, referring to Daley the President suddenly blurted out loud, “Hey, who are you? Whatever happened to Rahm Emanuel!?”
 

Steve

Well-known member
"We need a new planet. We need a new planet called Stupider, and I need to put Nancy Pelosi on it as the mayor of the whole planet, as the governor, as the evil emperor, whatever," he said.

hard to believe at one point she was only a few steps away from being President..

but I am sure it gave Bush and Cheney a nice feeling knowing no one wanted her as President,.. and that reassured Obama that no one wanted Biden or her as president..

(hey,.. a few were somewhat not ready for the liberal black president.. so he needed two imbeciles just in case.. )




(besides it would look awfully suspicious if all three were some how taken out and Hillery was standing there with a note pad full of suicide notes..
 

iwannabeacowboy

Well-known member
Steve said:
Borowitz can be funny and worth adding to a thread if it is relevant to the topic..

for instance.. on the scandals..
Obama Asks Staff to Start Cc’ing Him on Stuff

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a dramatic departure from existing White House procedures, President Obama requested today that his staff start cc’ing him on stuff.

“Look, I know a lot of you think I’m really busy and you don’t want to bother me,” the President reportedly told his staff in an Oval Office meeting. “But cc me anyway. It’s good for me to keep up on what’s going on around here.”

“It’s not good when I turn on the news and they’re talking about something at the White House and I’m like, whoa, when did that happen?” Mr. Obama added. “I think cc’ing me would go a long way toward fixing that.”

“Maybe put a Post-It note on your computer saying, ‘CC POTUS,’ so you don’t forget,” he said as the meeting broke up.

Afterward, the President told aides that he “felt really good” about the meeting and was “really looking forward to people looping me in on stuff.”

But Mr. Obama’s mood soured later in the day, sources say, when his e-mail address was left off a message bearing the subject line, “Things the Treasury Dept. Is Planning to Do.”

Mr. Obama hastily reconvened his staff, telling them, “Look, maybe I didn’t make myself clear. That’s just the kind of thing I should have been cc’d on. Even Biden got that one. Could one of you please forward it to me?”

As of press time, Mr. Obama had not yet received the e-mail.

or if you want to mock the republicans and think the scandals are over blown.. this one is relevant..
Republicans Question Whether Obama Could Handle Actual Scandal

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—President Obama’s handling of controversies about the I.R.S., the Justice Department, and Benghazi has raised “grave doubts” about his ability to cope if he ever became involved in an actual scandal, prominent Republicans said today.

“If this is how he handles this stuff, Lord have mercy on him if he ever has to deal with a real scandal,” said newly elected Rep. Mark Sanford (R-S. Carolina). “Quite frankly, I don’t think he has what it takes.”

“The true test of a leader is this,” Rep. Sanford added. “When he gets in a fix, does he have the presence of mind to lie about his whereabouts? Sadly, I don’t think President Obama passes that test.”

Mr. Sanford’s concerns mirror those of another leading Republican lawmaker, Sen. David Vitter (R-Louisiana).

“If President Obama honestly thinks he’s dealing with scandals right now, I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know what a scandal is,” Sen. Vitter said. “And that’s very worrisome.”

“When you get that three A.M. phone call, and it’s a reporter claiming that a prostitute said you like to dress up in a diaper, are you prepared for that call?” Sen. Vitter said. “In the case of President Obama, I am afraid that the answer is no.”

then we could counter that humor with this one..
Obama Denies Role in Government

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—President Obama used his weekly radio address on Saturday to reassure the American people that he has “played no role whatsoever” in the U.S. government over the past four years.

“Right now, many of you are angry at the government, and no one is angrier than I am,” he said. “Quite frankly, I am glad that I have had no involvement in such an organization.”

The President’s outrage only increased, he said, when he “recently became aware of a part of that government called the Department of Justice.”

“The more I learn about the activities of these individuals, the more certain I am that I would not want to be associated with them,” he said. “They sound like bad news.”

Mr. Obama closed his address by indicating that beginning next week he would enforce what he called a “zero tolerance policy on governing.”

“If I find that any members of my Administration have had any intimate knowledge of, or involvement in, the workings of the United States government, they will be dealt with accordingly,” he said.

but the liberals on this site can't seem to get their Borowitz reports on topic..

so in a thread about how stupid pissylusi is.. they would continue to show constant scandal Borowitz reports and not understand why conservatives failed to see the humor..

I sure wish this one was on scandal... cause Borowitz seems to be shifting sides these days.. at least the liberals have this one to laugh at.. ...
Republicans Agree to Stop Using Word “Scandal” in Every Sentence If Obama Resigns


ahhhh, still isn't funny. Making fun of 4 American's not only dying, not only leaving them to die, but preventing anyone from even assisting them isn't funny and making light of that is just asinine.

Same goes for the tyranny of the IRS, Zerocare, and no longer having a free press. I just can't laugh at that.

Haven't found borrow some wits funny because, well... he isn't funny. He is a distractor. He is a written version of John Daily.

You ever wonder why the most popular shows of the left are comedians? Because when you have a real conversation about the matters, their ideas don't hold water. Therefor, they have a one sided conversation filled with jokes about peoples lives being ruined. But hey, it is a joke- no problem right?

Did you hear the one about the people who lost their 1st, 2nd, 4th, and 5th, amendment rights?

Punch line: It's you and I- pretty freaking funny! or maybe not :cry:
 
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