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More Blonde Jokes

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Anonymous

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THE MOON
>>
>>Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench
>>talking, one blonde says to the other, "Which do you
>>think is farther away, Florida or the moon?"
>>
>>The other blonde turns and says "Hellooo, can you see
>>Florida?"
>>
>>CAR TROUBLE
>>
>>A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells
>>the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few
>>minutes, it is idling smoothly. She says, "What's the
>>story?"
>>
>>He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
>>
>>She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
>>
>>RIVER WALK
>>
>>There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a
>>river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank.
>>"Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other
>>side?"
>>
>>The second blonde looks up the river then down the
>>river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
>>
>>AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE
>>
>>A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office
>>and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
>>
>>"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
>>
>>The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast
>>and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed
>>in even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
>>likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere
>>she touched made her scream.
>>
>>The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are
>>you?
>>
>>"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
>>
>>"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is
>>broken."
>>
>>
>>
>>KNITTING
>>
>>A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on
>>the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to
>>see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
>>Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing
>>lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window,
>>turned on his
>>
>>bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
>>
>>"NO!" the blonde yelled back, " SCARF!"
>>
>>BLONDE ON THE SUN
>>
>>A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one
>>day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
>>
>>The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
>>
>>The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first
>>on the sun!"
>>
>>The Russian and the American looked at each other and
>>shook their heads.
>>
>>"You can't land on the sun! You'll burn up!" said the
>>Russian.
>>
>>To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you
>>know. We're going at night!"
>>
>>IN A VACUUM
>>
>>A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. She
>>rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.
>>Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone
>>calls your name, can you hear it?"
>>
>>She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or
>>off?"
>>
>>FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
>>
>>A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had
>>acquired two dogs, and asked what their names were.
>>The blonde responded by saying that one was named
>>Rolex and the other Timex.
>>
>>Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs
>>like that?"
>>
>>"HELLLOOO...," answered the blond. "They're watch
>>dogs!"
 
A

Anonymous

Guest
montana cowgurl said:
ooohhh man...i love readin those...even tho im a blonde....lol :wink: :lol: :p :D

I love sending them to my blonde daughter in college :wink: :lol: -- And everyone around here knows what a bad time I give her so sends them to me.....
 

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