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My favorite Groaner!

fedup2

Well-known member
A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and
informs the dad that his son was born without torso, arms or legs. The son
is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can,
with love and compassion.

After 21 years, the son is old enough for his first drink. Dad
takes him to the bar and tearfully tells the son he is proud of him. Dad
orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons
looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the
boy takes his first sip of alcohol.

Swoooop! A torso pops out!

The bar is dead silent; then bursts into a whoop of joy.

The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant
"Take another drink"! The bartender still shakes his head in dismay.

Swoooop! Two arms pops out.

The bar goes wild. The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink
again. The patrons chant "Take another drink"! The bartender ignores
the whole affair.

By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches
down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it.

Swoooop! Two legs pop out.

The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully
thanks God. The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left....
then to the right.... right through the front door, into the street, where a
truck runs over him and kills him instantly.

The bar falls silent. The father moans in grief.

The bartender sighs and says, "That boy should have quit while he
was still a head."
 

Kato

Well-known member
That's my second favourite groaner! I've been inflicting it on people for years. :D :D

Here's my favourite.

Did you hear about the two ships that collided in the middle of the Pacific?

One was carrying a load of blue paint, and the other was carrying a load of red paint.






















Both crews were marooned. 8) :D :D :D :D
 

fedup2

Well-known member
This farmer had a sick cat and called the Vet in town to see what could be done for it. The Vet asked the farmer what the problem was. After being told, the Vet told the farmer to give it a pint of castor oil.

The farmer asked, "A whole pint?" The Vet replied, "Sure that'll fix it right up."

The next day the Vet saw the farmer in town and asked him how the sick calf was getting along. "You fool!" the farmer exclaimed, "That wasn't a calf. It was a cat."

The Vet said, "Oh my goodness! Did you give it the whole pint of castor oil?" "Sure did," the farmer replied.

"What happened? Where is the cat now?" asked the Vet.

The farmer pointing said, "The last time I saw that cat, he was going over yonder on that hill with five others. Two were digging, two were covering up, and one was scouting for new territory."
 
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