I had the tune of Cowboy in a Continental suit running thru my head, so wrote this parody. With apoligies to Marty Robbins and who ever wrote the original. If you sing it to that tune, it comes out pretty good.
Wanna'be in a cowboy suit
A “wanna’be” showed up one time, all dressed up to the brim
said, “I’d never met a man, who was quite as good as him”
“He wanted to be a cowboy, with a horse that liked to prance”
I thought it might just be some fun, to give this guy a chance
Now, the horse that I caught up for him, was pretty as you please
he’d really watch a cow, and could dang sure split the breeze
he’d always been plumb gentle, ain’t never tried to buck
but when this stranger saddled up, he’s dang sure out a luck
Ol’ Dunny’d never seen no one, who tried what this guy tried
he went about it like a man, attemptin’ suicide
saddle went on backwards, and the bridle give him fits
pulled his hat down low, took a chew, then he spits
I stopped him ‘fore he climbed on up, tho’ it would’a been a show
said, “that rig is on backwards”, but he wouldn’t eat no crow
claimed, “this was how he’d always rode, since he was just a kid”
“and the good hands where he come from, all saddled like he did”
I gets the saddled turned around, and dunny gave a sigh
I seen this guy’s a liar, but I wondered what he’d try
it was really quit a picture, when he climbs ol’ dunny’s back
his hindquarters was so dang wide, they plumb filled up that kack
He jerked ol’ dunny’s mouth, then thumped his poor ol’ ribs
just like every pilgrim does, who thinks he’s casey tibbs
ol’ dunny’s gettin’ sick and tired, of all this here abuse
for the first time in his life, ol’ dunny cuts her loose
His back feet went in the air, his front ones on the ground
he’s kickin’ and a squealin’, tryin’ to shake this phony down
and the greenhorn is a screamer, sounds ‘purt ‘neer like a girl
by the color of his face, why he’s just about to hurl
Then dunny kicks it into high, and really turns it on
he’s twistin’ and a buckin’, to get this here dude gone
he’s lost his hat and tore his chaps, and ripped his brand new shirt
when he flies off of dunny’s back, and plops down in the dirt
Now, ever since, ol’ dunny bucks, and he’s gettin’ hard to ride
I wouldn’t want try him, ‘cept for I still got my pride
Stranger wasn’t hurt too bad, but he cussed me plumb to hell
But thats all right, I got a laugh and this here tale to tell
Well the moral of this story, is very plain to see
it’s always fun to see a braggart, cut off at the knee
but you’ll find that it ain’t funny, nor even kind of cute
when his lawyer sends you papers, for that costly lawsuit
Jinglebob 2/07
By the way, I sent this to a female friend and she took offense at the line, "screamed "purt 'neer like a girl" because she thought I was saying that woman were scared of things or cowardly. But I didn' t use it that way. I am implying that he is using a high falsetto voice, like a woman when she scream.
Any of you females find this offensive?
:???:
Wanna'be in a cowboy suit
A “wanna’be” showed up one time, all dressed up to the brim
said, “I’d never met a man, who was quite as good as him”
“He wanted to be a cowboy, with a horse that liked to prance”
I thought it might just be some fun, to give this guy a chance
Now, the horse that I caught up for him, was pretty as you please
he’d really watch a cow, and could dang sure split the breeze
he’d always been plumb gentle, ain’t never tried to buck
but when this stranger saddled up, he’s dang sure out a luck
Ol’ Dunny’d never seen no one, who tried what this guy tried
he went about it like a man, attemptin’ suicide
saddle went on backwards, and the bridle give him fits
pulled his hat down low, took a chew, then he spits
I stopped him ‘fore he climbed on up, tho’ it would’a been a show
said, “that rig is on backwards”, but he wouldn’t eat no crow
claimed, “this was how he’d always rode, since he was just a kid”
“and the good hands where he come from, all saddled like he did”
I gets the saddled turned around, and dunny gave a sigh
I seen this guy’s a liar, but I wondered what he’d try
it was really quit a picture, when he climbs ol’ dunny’s back
his hindquarters was so dang wide, they plumb filled up that kack
He jerked ol’ dunny’s mouth, then thumped his poor ol’ ribs
just like every pilgrim does, who thinks he’s casey tibbs
ol’ dunny’s gettin’ sick and tired, of all this here abuse
for the first time in his life, ol’ dunny cuts her loose
His back feet went in the air, his front ones on the ground
he’s kickin’ and a squealin’, tryin’ to shake this phony down
and the greenhorn is a screamer, sounds ‘purt ‘neer like a girl
by the color of his face, why he’s just about to hurl
Then dunny kicks it into high, and really turns it on
he’s twistin’ and a buckin’, to get this here dude gone
he’s lost his hat and tore his chaps, and ripped his brand new shirt
when he flies off of dunny’s back, and plops down in the dirt
Now, ever since, ol’ dunny bucks, and he’s gettin’ hard to ride
I wouldn’t want try him, ‘cept for I still got my pride
Stranger wasn’t hurt too bad, but he cussed me plumb to hell
But thats all right, I got a laugh and this here tale to tell
Well the moral of this story, is very plain to see
it’s always fun to see a braggart, cut off at the knee
but you’ll find that it ain’t funny, nor even kind of cute
when his lawyer sends you papers, for that costly lawsuit
Jinglebob 2/07
By the way, I sent this to a female friend and she took offense at the line, "screamed "purt 'neer like a girl" because she thought I was saying that woman were scared of things or cowardly. But I didn' t use it that way. I am implying that he is using a high falsetto voice, like a woman when she scream.
Any of you females find this offensive?
:???: