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Personality

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Sierraman

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Hope I haven't opened up a subject too deep for the Coffee Shop, but I was wondering if y'all think personality is inherited, developed by experiences, or chosen by a person. I personally think all play a part, but that people definitely have a choice on their personality.
 

Mudhen

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Well personally I think it is a combo of stuff but key factor is the environment you grow up in. I not think it’s inherited but it is close to it, doing to the fact that is the environment you know of being. But then again what is my 2 cents worth?
 

SASH

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Sierraman said:
Hope I haven't opened up a subject too deep for the Coffee Shop, but I was wondering if y'all think personality is inherited, developed by experiences, or chosen by a person. I personally think all play a part, but that people definitely have a choice on their personality.

If you had a 'multiple personality disorder' maybe you can have one affected by each.
Seriously, I would guess that personality tendencies would be inherited while the environment would just mold those tendencies into a person's personality. Also, the current environment a person is in will have a large affect on how that person acts. I've seen the personalities of people totally change due to a change in job or marital status or even the type of people who are around that person at any given time.
 

TXTibbs

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I think a lot of personality is inherited, but also I think it depends greatly on the individual. I know people who grew up in the same house, same rules, same family and the personalities are like night and day. Some take bits and pieces from their father, others their mother, gramma, grandpa or even their neighbors, teachers or other role models. I myself am not sure where mine come from, but from time to time if your around me enough you can see parts of my father, mother, gramma's, grandpa's and other people mixed in me. As one grows and progresses through life they tend to grab their own opinions, which in itself in a way builds a personality for that individual. Until you get about teenage years...12 or 13 you basically just go with what your parents or role models say. But after you get to the age to where you have your own opinions and beliefs you tend to stand up and stick with them. Hence why many people have trouble with teens...they are just realizing that they are at a point in their lives to where they actually have opinions and dont' have to just nod and agree with everything that goes on. (sometimes it causes trouble..haha) Your views on certain subjects and topics and world issues all plays into your personality and how it is being shaped. When is a personality finished, or I mean when does ones personality stop changing? Never....Ones personality changes over time or as little as a snap of a finger, but there is always a "core personality" that I believe is set in to you from birth which is only molded by your family beliefs and values and from your experiences while growing up. I say growing up....prolly up to that age of about 10 or 12......ok i gotta go now....i wandered off after i started writing this about 5 times and then came back so i'm sure it makes no sense. Gotta run...
 
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Some of the experts claim that much of your mental makeup including your personality is developed before you are 5 years old-- that is the reason they say that abused young children have such a rough road to hoe as they mature.......
 

V_Key

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SASH said:
Sierraman said:
Hope I haven't opened up a subject too deep for the Coffee Shop, but I was wondering if y'all think personality is inherited, developed by Tendencies . I personally think all play a part, but that people definitely have a choice on their personality.

If you had a 'multiple personality disorder' maybe you can have one affected by each.
Seriously, I would guess that personality tendencies would be inherited while the environment would just mold those tendencies into a person's personality. Also, the current environment a person is in will have a large affect on how that person acts. I've seen the personalities of people totally change due to a change in job or marital status or even the type of people who are around that person at any given time.

I think one interits Personality Tandencies that can be affected by Life, Development, Inviorment and more. BUT in the End -
"One Makes the Choices!"

*Some chose to let others Chose for them.
*Some chose to let the Pack Chose.
*Some chose to say they let God Chose.
*Some chose to make their own Choice.

I hope when my time comes, I can stand before 'myGod' and say:
""I" made the Choice." :D
 

ranchwife

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deep subject, sierraman!! :wink: I personally believe i "learned" my personality from my dad....you see, i was lucky enough to have a man marry my mom when i was 5 years old and raise me as though i were his own flesh and blood....however, when folks see us together and how we interact, they would NEVER guess that he was not my dna donor!!! My mothers eyes are blue...my dna donor's eyes are blue and my eyes are green...just like my "dads"!!! He always wanted to make people smile and would do anything to make his kids laugh...one of the hardest working men i have ever had the privilege of meeting and folks who get to know me always comment on how much like my "dad" i am!!! Make no mistake, though..he IS my dad as far as i am concerned!!! My sister "inherited" our dna donor's personality, however......unfortunately...even though we were raised in the same house, under the same rules and given the same love and discipline, she turned out JUST LIKE HIM!!! Sad :(
 

Jeannie

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Sierraman said:
Hope I haven't opened up a subject too deep for the Coffee Shop, but I was wondering if y'all think personality is inherited, developed by experiences, or chosen by a person. I personally think all play a part, but that people definitely have a choice on their personality.

I believe that one's basic personality is inherited, but is then influenced by one's parent's and family (their values, outlook's, what they deem to be 'proper' behaviour, how accepting of individuality they are, etc) which may cause some aspects to get played down and others to flourish. As an individual matures, grows, and get's to know themselves better, he/she also makes personal choices as to how he/she is going to handle the day-to-day problems and stress that life gives each of us and those choices affect one's personality. These choices can be influenced by family, friends, co-workers, etc.

P.S. Excellent question! I'm glad you asked it! :D
 

Sierraman

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I think more of it is chosen than we realize. My dad is so shy, he won't talk to anyone if he doesn't have to. My mom will talk to people she knows/ I'm a bit more outgoing, and I know that I had to decide what that they passed to me I wanted to hold. I found they were right on almost ewverything. The most important things, absolutely. Now, that I have some of my own opinions, there are some differences, but really only in the details. Experiences have helped m,old me. I know they showed me mnore ways. Being with my cousin, I saw a new way of greeting people that I have taken as a good model.
 

nr

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Sierraman said:
I think more of it is chosen than we realize. My dad is so shy, he won't talk to anyone if he doesn't have to. My mom will talk to people she knows/ I'm a bit more outgoing, and I know that I had to decide what that they passed to me I wanted to hold. I found they were right on almost ewverything. The most important things, absolutely. Now, that I have some of my own opinions, there are some differences, but really only in the details. Experiences have helped m,old me. I know they showed me mnore ways. Being with my cousin, I saw a new way of greeting people that I have taken as a good model.

Sierraman, I was thinking about shyness earlier, too. It seems to be a personality type which can be altered if a person chooses though the core personality will never become the type person who just has to have lots of people around to feel content. But by accomplishing small steps of reaching out to people, making that an actual daily goal, and gaining some confidence with each one, it is amazing over months and years how a shy person can change. I've seen that for a fact.

The majority of us won't meet our fullest potential. We're not motivated to work hard at changing ourselves. But no pain, no gain.
(It is much easier to complain about someone else! :D :roll: )

Your point of learning from a good model ( your cousin) was an excellent reminder.
 

Faster horses

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My husband is pretty shy also. Me, I never met a stranger. So we are opposites and in more ways than one. Once my husband makes a friend, he never loses him/her. He is very loyal and has helped me to see how I come across to others. (I always know I have their best interests at heart. Sometimes I know this when they don't.) Anyway, my husband has taught me to see things from others prospective. It is okay to have someone's best interests at heart only when it is okay with them. I am like a bull in a china closet and he has helped temper that somewhat.

In other words, "Smart people don't need advice, stupid people won't take it." I have been perhaps a 'little too helpful' at times. Our grandson has this same quality. Causes him a little trouble in school. He only means to help, but the teacher doesn't always appreciate his help.... :wink:

The story I wish to relate here about shyness, has to do with my brother-in-law. He was so shy, he was almost backward. When I was dating my husband and would go out to their ranch, the brother would go sit on the corral until I left. Anyway, he got married to a wrench of a girl. She made his life totally miserable. In finding how to deal with her, he found God. God strengthened him in so many ways. The marriage didn't last, though he knows he did everything he possibly could to make it last. When he learned through the Bible how man is to be in a marriage, and started doing those things, she didn't like it one bit. You cannot imagine the horror she created for him and the kids. (I have truly thought at times she is a child of the devil.) Anyhow, they divorced. Today he has so much strength that he preaches the Word of God when a pastor is gone. He sings in the choir, plays a guitar, etc. When his uncle passed away in Wyoming last June, he preached the funeral services. His progression has been a wonderful thing to see. Had I not seen it for myself through the years, I doubt if I would believe it was possible that he could get up in front of a room full of people and speak.

So, nr, you are correct in that we can change the way we are. Something tramatic has to happen to make us want to change, I believe. But we can, with God's help.
 

nr

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Faster Horses: "the brother would go sit on the corral until I left. "

FH, LOL! You must really be somethin'! :clap: I laughed and laughed. Can't wait to meet you on Sep 1! :D
 

OldDog/NewTricks

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Faster horses said:
Something tramatic has to happen to make us want to change, I believe. But we can, with God's help.

Ok I'll open that can of worms:

I think God will Help BUT If HE/SHE is our Parent
As Adults - he would rather see us change on our OWN

As a Parent it made me PROUD when I saw my Childern Making The Right Choses with out my Help!

Should not God have the Right to feel the same way about Us? :???:
 

Saddletramp

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I might be way off of the line of thought here,but to me personality is mostly in our nature. I do believe that God has alot to do with our personality but we must let Him work in our lives. Again, it's alot about choice.

Many people think they can change themselves for someone or they can change someone for themselves.

It all comes back to your nature and how bad you your self want to change.

Her's another angle to the equation..... I once worked with a young gal at the salebarn. She was a top hand,she could take more weather than most anyone I knew and she was always upbeat and had a great sense of humor which is very important in my book.

One day she took a sorting gate in the forehead and when she came back to work acouple of weeks later she was absolutely a different person. I mean you wouldn't have known it was her from before the accident. She didn't only act different, she could no longer take the heat or cold or stand to work longer hours or nothing. The worst part was she toltally lost her charming sense of humur and became a different girl than anyone could remember.

So... What happened? Something sure changed her nature.

Just an experience I knew of.
 

nr

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Saddletramp said:
I might be way off of the line of thought here,but to me personality is mostly in our nature. I do believe that God has alot to do with our personality but we must let Him work in our lives. Again, it's alot about choice.

Many people think they can change themselves for someone or they can change someone for themselves.

It all comes back to your nature and how bad you your self want to change.

Her's another angle to the equation..... I once worked with a young gal at the salebarn. She was a top hand,she could take more weather than most anyone I knew and she was always upbeat and had a great sense of humor which is very important in my book.

One day she took a sorting gate in the forehead and when she came back to work acouple of weeks later she was absolutely a different person. I mean you wouldn't have known it was her from before the accident. She didn't only act different, she could no longer take the heat or cold or stand to work longer hours or nothing. The worst part was she toltally lost her charming sense of humur and became a different girl than anyone could remember.

So... What happened? Something sure changed her nature.

Just an experience I knew of.

Sounds like she had a severe injury to the brain. What a sad injury. I tended to a patient once who hit her head falling off a horse. From this injury she totallly lost much of her memory. You could ask her what she'd just eaten for breakfast and she would not know. She also could not remember her children which meant much pain when they visited her.
She could no longer live alone because so much depends on memory though physically otherwise she was healthy.
 

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