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political joke

jodywy

Well-known member
A Republican, in a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?"

The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.

The next patron to come in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there honey! How's about getting me a cold mug of Miller Light?" He too looked across the restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer. "On my bill," he said loudly.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.

Jesus passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Libertarian felt his back straightening up and he raised his hands, praised the Lord, and did a series of back flips out the door.

Then, Jesus walked towards the Democrat, just smiling. The Democrat jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me .... I'm on disability!"
 

gcreekrch

Well-known member
A man was out elk hunting in Colorado. About dark he had his chance and shot a huge bull. After field dressing it, the man decided it was too dark to find his truck so made do laying out in the bush.

It kept getting colder until the man got the idea to crawl inside the elk carcass. There, he was warmed by the heat the carcass still held.

Upon awaking in the morning, he found that the temperature had dropped even more drastically than he could have imagined, effectively sealing him in a frozen tomb.

"Dear God". the man wailed, "Why have you done this to me?"

Panic stricken, the man racked his brain to come up with a reason for his misfortune. Realizing he had voted for Obama, he felt so small that he stood up and walked out the bunghole.
 

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