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Poor Daughter

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I Luv Herfrds

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She came home yesterday pretty depressed.
It seems that her classmates are excluding her from everything. They won't play with her, eat lunch, invite her to birthday parties and have made nasty remarkls about the treats she has brought to class parties. (These were all home made.)
The teacher has tried to help by making the girls all sit together during lunch, that just made it all worse. I told her to not make them.
After the nasty remark about the cupcakes at Halloween I told the teacher next time I was just going to buy a thing of store cookies and stick them in my pantry for several months then send those in for their treat.
No remarks since.

One girl told my daughter she would be her friend but only in private and not at school. In my book that's not a friend.

She doesn't want me to make anything for her class for her birthday. But she does want a party. So I have been thinking of people we know with kids around her age who would be willing to come and what I can send to school to celebrate her birthday.

So far I am planning on sending her a nice bouquet of flowers to the school for her birthday and to do a pizza party here and to get some ice cream from Cold Stone Creamery.

Anybody got some ideas too?
 

katrina

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Is there any name calling?? It sounds like boarder line bullying. Your teacher is not doing her job and this should be nip in the bud.. If not you need to see the principle and If not satisfied go on up.. We dealt with bullying at the Christian school, guess they were better christians than us.. Anyways your deal has to stop... One thing I will say is that you will have the best relationship with your daughter if you follow through because it will show to you daughter that you really care and love her... This could be a real problem later on for your daughter with self confidence if this is not resolved.... Just trying to ignore the problem is not healthy for your girl.. Keep us updated.. And good luck.. Kids don't need this type of stuff...... It's hard enough as it is.....
 

Silver

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Well that's a pretty sad deal. Nothing meaner than kids. How old is she?
I know it's a fine line between doing what you can for your kids and fighting their battles for them. I'm sure we all had our trials as kids, and a person hates to see their kids going through anything like that.
Is there an option for another school in the area?
 

MsSage

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Im sorry its so hard on us moms. I agree meet with the teacher and i no resolution meet with the Principal. I say have a gathering at home but on her birthday f youcan go take a nice lunch and have lucnh with your daughter...I know most schools if the parent is there they get a bit longer lunch.....
Maybe one solution would be for you to come in and read "Oliver Button Is a Sissy" by Tommie DePaola its a good book...it tells the story of a kid who was bullied and overcame it by being himself. If not, make sure you share it with your daughter.
Sending prayers for this situation.
 

I Luv Herfrds

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May 9th.
She is 10.

The other school in the area is not much better for stopping bullying. we transfered our son from that school because of it.

the kids are saying she has rabies.

the teacher is the mom of one of her classmates. Probably worried about upsetting the other parents she is friends with.

there is a parents week to eat at the school.

Going to talk to the principle and super tomorrow. Both are nice guys and hate bullying.
 

sweetbasil

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I Luv Herfrds said:
May 9th.
She is 10.

The other school in the area is not much better for stopping bullying. we transfered our son from that school because of it.

the kids are saying she has rabies.

the teacher is the mom of one of her classmates. Probably worried about upsetting the other parents she is friends with.

there is a parents week to eat at the school.

Going to talk to the principle and super tomorrow. Both are nice guys and hate bullying.

I am glad you are going to talk to the teacher and the principal. I mentioned your daughter's situation to my Mother and she suggested that the best thing is to meet with the teacher and the principal. It sounds like problem is rooted in the classroom and is carried outside in the playground. She also mentioned that there is "a school harassment law" that can be use to protect your daughter from this type of situation.

Regarding her birthday party, I have a random suggestion:
Placing an ad on the paper/craiglist to other ranchers/farmers families that might have children her age to come to the party. There are always kids who are in similar situations like her that will be very happy to have her as a friend.

Below is a link to the Oriental Trading Company; it is a great company to buy things to make theme parties...

http://www.orientaltrading.com/

Good luck to you tomorrow. Hope everything gets resolved.
 

MsSage

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there is a parents week to eat at the school.
You mean you cant have lunch with her at any time? hmmm the past The past 6 years things have changed more than I thought.
Verify that your school has a No Tolerance policy on bullying.....
 

katrina

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And if you don't get any satisfaction go to the schoo board and if all else fails the cops...... I am mean and nasty when it comes to bullying and there is NOOOOO excuse for it... Need me to come up and go with you?? :D :D All jokes aside take your husband or a relative..
 

WyomingRancher

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That's horrible, it makes you wonder what kind of parents these brats are being raised by. Recently, a 13 year old committed suicide in Cheyenne due to bullying. He was a very nice, but shy, reserved kid.

I attended a dog clinic this weekend, and met a lady who is a school counselor. She said kids today are a lot crueler, and bullying using social media/texting is rampant.

I'm sorry your daughter is going through this.
 

katrina

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WyomingRancher said:
That's horrible, it makes you wonder what kind of parents these brats are being raised by. Recently, a 13 year old committed suicide in Cheyenne due to bullying. He was a very nice, but shy, reserved kid.

I attended a dog clinic this weekend, and met a lady who is a school counselor. She said kids today are a lot crueler, and bullying using social media/texting is rampant.

I'm sorry your daughter is going through this.

Yup... This is why you have to make a stand.. And for gods sake don't let them try and tell you your kid is partly to blame.... :mad: Been there on that one too...
 

katrina

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Here is a story that happened to me when I was a seventh grader.. I've never told anyone. I went to a country school k through 8th grade. One of the eight graders was a girl who was friends with me. And being that age we turn into young ladies..... Fast forward a few months and one of my classmates is a boy who is kinda on the mischieviouse side we are good friends most of the times.. He does tease us girls so we do take care of that. Anyways he's reading the dictonary and there kinda a risky picture and he asks to speak to me. He shows me the picture and I laugh whitch makes the teacher mad and tells dave to got to his seat and that all I do is teach sex educaation in the bathroom..In front of the whole school.. I burst into tears and call my Mom.. I am soooo embarrassed... These are families I have grown up with and rode with either them or there granddads when I go with my dad. I drive home after school and my mom and dad sit down with me and I explain what happened.. We load up and go into the teachers house and the teacher tells us that my friend's mom had told her about a conversation my girlfriend and I had during one weekend we spent together...... We get everthing sorted out. The teacher resigns from teaching, never teaches again but, she is now a pastor in a church.. I to this day hate this women and want to ask her if she had made amends with Christ for what she did to me? She has never come to me to apolize for what she did...... I am sooooo grateful for my folks who listened to me and stood up for me...If they hadn't I don't know what I would of done.... Kids need their familie's support wither when the kids do well and when they don't....
 

I Luv Herfrds

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We have a great superindent. He does not tolerate bullying.
Our son was getting bullied too. the superindent told him that if they laid hands on him then he had every right to defend himself.
So far 1 boy has ended up with a bloody nose after punching my son and the same kid also got a return kick between the legs for the one he did to my son. Kid learned not to kick a farm kid wearing wook boots.
another kid liked to tackle my son and put him in a choke hold, when my son told me this I taught him how to get the kid to let go, I call it the nut cracker. son only had to do it twice.
nobody messes with him now.

Wish I could teach my daughter all this.
 

katrina

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I Luv Herfrds said:
We have a great superindent. He does not tolerate bullying.
Our son was getting bullied too. the superindent told him that if they laid hands on him then he had every right to defend himself.
So far 1 boy has ended up with a bloody nose after punching my son and the same kid also got a return kick between the legs for the one he did to my son. Kid learned not to kick a farm kid wearing wook boots.
another kid liked to tackle my son and put him in a choke hold, when my son told me this I taught him how to get the kid to let go, I call it the nut cracker. son only had to do it twice.
nobody messes with him now.

Wish I could teach my daughter all this.

Hello!! You can.... I learned to box. We had boxing gloves and the whole bit.. Most fun I had was when Pistol Miller was my coach.. What a hoot and my poor brother!!
 

Shortgrass

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I guess things haven't changed much from my school days. I was made fun of for being a "cowboy." My folks taught me to deal with the "sticks & stone may break my bones, but names will never hurt me" cliche'. If others treat me that way, they are wrong, they have a problem, not me. Just be the kindest a nicest person I can, even if others are rude, and see if it doesn't eventually fix itself. Learn to deal with it, because this is life. A law against bullying is futile as trying to get the cattle to do away with their pecking order. Bullying is wrong, yes, but it is part of human nature, and it is here to stay.
 

cure

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Sorry to hear about your daughters problem when I was in school I got bullied a lot till on day when the school jock running his mouth and I had enough and processed to knock out his front teeth with the toe of my boot never had any problems after that. Sometimes you just need to open a can of whoop ass.
 

Angus Cattle Shower

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cure said:
Sorry to hear about your daughters problem when I was in school I got bullied a lot till on day when the school jock running his mouth and I had enough and processed to knock out his front teeth with the toe of my boot never had any problems after that. Sometimes you just need to open a can of whoop ass.

First day of grade one i broke a bully's nose. In grade six the guys on the bus in highschool picked on me until i hipchecked and levelled him in the parking lot. I haven't had a problem since then.

No one should have to deal with bullying, some kids need to learn how to walk a mile in someone else's shoes
 

I Luv Herfrds

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Superindent was out today so I spoke with the principle. He was not happy hearing about the name calling. He has already spoken with the teacher and I got a message from her tonight and the kids doing it are getting a warning tomorrow.
the next time it happens they will be removed from the class and their parents called.

I had 3 different people tell me how seewt my daughter is and how friendly she is. these people were not happy hearing how she is being treated.

Katrina she will be taught the same thing her brother was, don't throw the first punch just the last one.
 

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