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Sheldon the Perfect

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Soapweed

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Location
northern Nebraska Sandhills
A man walking in downtown Manhattan gets caught in a sudden downpour. Fortunately, he spots a passing taxi, hails it, and immediately jumps in.

"Perfect timing!" the cabbie says. "You're just like Sheldon."

"Who?" asks the man.

"Sheldon Cohen. Now there's a guy who did everything right! Like my cab being right beside you as the rain hit. That's the sort of break that Sheldon would have got -- every time."

"Really?" says the man. "Well, nobody is lucky ALL the time. There are always bad bounces along the way."

"Not Sheldon," says the cabbie. "He was a terrific athlete. He could have made millions in tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone and danced like a Broadway star. Handsome and sophisticated?..... better than Cary Grant. He had a better body than Arnold in his prime."

"He was something, huh?" the man replies.

"Something?" says the cabbie. "Sheldon had a mind like a computer. Could remember everyone's birthday. Could speak five languages. Knew all about wine, had read all the classics, wrote poetry. And he could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse and the whole neighborhood blacks out!"

"Wow!" says the man. "No wonder you remember him so well."

"Well," says the cabbie, "I never actually met Sheldon."

"Then how do you know so much about him?"


"I married his widow."
 
Funny one! Couldn't see that one coming at all!
 

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