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The $2 Bill

Liberty Belle

Well-known member
Everyone should start carrying them! I am STILL laughing!! I think we need to quit saving our $2 bills and bring them out in public. The younger generation doesn't know they exist.

On my way home from work, I stopped at Taco Bell for a quick bite to eat. In my billfold are a $50 bill and a $2 bill. I figure that with a $2 bill, I can get something to eat and not have to worry about anyone getting irritated at me for trying to break a $50 bill.

Me: "Hi, I'd like one seven-layer burrito please, to go."

Server: "That'll be $1.04. Eat in?"

Me: "No, it's to go." At this point, I open my billfold and hand him the $2 bill. He looks at it kind of funny.

Server: "Uh, hang on a sec, I'll be right back." He goes to talk to his manager, who is still within my ear shot. The following conversation occurs between the two of them: Server: "Hey, you ever see a $2 bill?"

Manager: "No. A what?"

Server: "A $2 bill. This guy just gave it to me."

Manager: "Ask for something else. There's no such thing as a $2 bill."

Server: "Yeah, thought so." He comes back to me and says, "We don't take these. Do you have anything else?"

Me: "Just this fifty. You don't take $2 bills? Why?"

Server: "I don't know."

Me: "See here where it says legal tender?"

Server: "Yeah."

Me: "So, why won't you take it?"

Server: "Well, hang on a sec." He goes back to his manager, who has been watching me like I'm a shoplifter, and says to him, "He says I have to take it."

Manager: "Doesn't he have anything else?"

Server: "Yeah, a fifty. I'll get it and you can open the safe and get change."

Manager: "I'm not opening the safe with him in here."

Server: "What should I do?"

Manager: "Tell him to come back later when he has real money."

Server: "I can't tell him that! You tell him."

Manager: "Just tell him."

Server: "No way! This is weird. I'm going in back."

The manager approaches me and says, "I'm sorry, but we don't take big bills this time of night."

Me: "It's only seven o'clock! Well then, here's a two dollar bill."

Manager: "We don't take those, either."

Me: "Why not?"

Manager: "I think you know why."

Me: "No really, tell me why."

Manager: "Please leave before I call mall security."

Me: "Excuse me?"

Manager: "Please leave before I call mall security."

Me: "What on earth for?"

Manager: "Please, sir."

Me: "Uh, go ahead, call them."

Manager: "Would you please just leave?"

Me: "No."

Manager: "Fine -- have it your way then."

Me: "Hey, that's Burger King, isn't it?"

At this point, he backs away from me and calls mall security on the phone around the corner. I have two people staring at me from the dining area, and I begin laughing out loud, just for effect. A few minutes later this 45-year-oldish guy comes in.

Guard: "Yeah, Mike, what's up?"

Manager (whispering): "This guy is trying to give me some (pause) funny money."

Guard: "No kidding! What?"

Manager: "Get this .. A two dollar bill."

Guard (incredulous): "Why would a guy fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager: "I don't know. He's kind a weird. He says the only other thing he has is a fifty."

Guard: "Oh, so the fifty's fake!"

Manager: "No, the two dollar bill is."

Guard: "Why would he fake a two dollar bill?"

Manager: "I don't know! Can you talk to him, and get him out of here?"

Guard: "Yeah."

Security Guard walks over to me and...... Guard: "Mike here tells me you have some fake bills you're trying to use."

Me: "Uh, no."

Guard: "Lemme see 'em."

Me: "Why?"

Guard: "Do you want me to get the cops in here?" At this point I am ready to say, "Sure, please!" but I want to eat, so I say "I'm just trying to buy a burrito and pay for it with this two dollar bill. I put the bill up near his face, and he flinches like I'm taking a swing at him. He takes the bill, turns it over a few times in his hands, and says, "Hey, Mike, what's wrong with this bill?"

Manager: "It's fake."

Guard: "It doesn't look fake to me."

Manager: "But it's a two dollar bill."

Guard: "Yeah?"

Manager: "Well, there's no such thing, is there?" The security guard and I both look at him like he's an idiot and it dawns on the guy that he has no clue. So, it turns out that my burrito was free, and he threw in a small drink and some of those cinnamon thingies, too. Made me want to get a whole stack of two dollar bills just to see what happens when I try to buy stuff. If I got the right group of people, I could probably end up in jail.

You get free food there, too.
 
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Anonymous

Guest
Anybody thats been to the track has seen lots of $2 bills- but there are getting to be less and less tracks and horse racing around too... :(
 

RoperAB

Well-known member
I only have three American $2 bills and it actually took me quite a while to get them. I used to ask the tellers at a few different banks in MT to save them for me if any came through their banks. Took quite some time to get them!
What ever happened to all the MT silver dollars? Years ago MT had a reputation in the East for these silver dollars but when I moved west I could never find any.
Another question.
Years ago American money was printed in different states and was always labled accordingly. Now its all from the Federal reserve. Why?
 

IL Rancher

Well-known member
They don't lable what district made hte bills anymore? Yikes... Shows how much I pay attention. As son as they strted making them collored like funny money I got a bit disappointed... I guess I miss my old money, lol.

MY Aunt used to give me silver dollars and two dollar bills all the time.. Turns out she liked the Res casino a bit and trips to the horse track.
 

RoperAB

Well-known member
IL Rancher said:
They don't lable what district made hte bills anymore? Yikes... Shows how much I pay attention. As son as they strted making them collored like funny money I got a bit disappointed... I guess I miss my old money, lol.
quote]

They stopped labeling the State roughly about ten years ago! Thats long before the new coloured money :wink:
 

IL Rancher

Well-known member
Good golly I don't pay much attention Roper... That was even before they made the giant heads on the bills. I'm a bit :oops: over that... Oh well, I don't hold onto cash long enough but to spend it these days.


Itis still on the singles.. The only old style bil we have left ;) I only ever have singles these days anyways.. The wife takes all my money...Yeah, blame her and the kids, that's the ticket
:lol: :lol:
 

Cowpuncher

Well-known member
I go to our local bank and order 100 $2 bills each year. It takes a couple of days for them to show up. They are brand new and in serial number order.

I give the grandchildren $2 bills for their birthdays - a two dollar bill for each year of age plus one extra. Makes a fairly inexpensive gift that is memorable.
 
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Anonymous

Guest
Northern Rancher said:
didn't Montfort pay out their payroll once in $2 bills to give the townfolk of Greeley an impromptu economic impact lesson.

I believe you are right...Back when we had the Air Force Base here they did that a couple of times- Paid in $2 bills, so the local business's could see the economic impact it had on the community...
 
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