The Affordable Boat Act (A.B.A.)

[Faster horses]

The Affordable Boat Act (A.B.A.)

The Democrats have passed and President Obama just signed into law the "The affordable boat act – ABA " declaring that every citizen MUST purchase a new boat, by April 2014. These "affordable" boats will cost an average of $54,000-$155,000 each. This does not include taxes, trailers, towing fees, licensing and registration fees, fuel, docking and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs.

This law has been passed, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase boats. This new laws ensures that every American can now have a "affordable" boat of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new boat. If you purchase your boat before the end of the year, you will receive 4 "free" life jackets; not including monthly usage fees.

In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable boat, the costs of owning a boat will increase on average of 250-400% per year. This way, wealthy people will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain. But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their boat will be regularly fined and children (under the age of 26) can use their parent's boats to party on until they turn 27; then must purchase their own boat.

If you already have a boat, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't). If you don't want or don't need a boat, you are required to buy one anyhow. If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $800 until you purchase one or face imprisonment.

Failure to use the boat will also result in fines. People living in the desert, ghettos, inner cities, or areas with no access to rivers, lakes or oceans are not exempt. Age, motion sickness, experience, knowledge nor lack of desire, are acceptable excuses for not using your boat.

A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between the port starboard or stern of a boat) will decide everything, including; when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your boat, along with how many people can ride your boat and determine if one is too old or healthy enough to be able to use their boat. They will also decide if your boat has out lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific accessories, (like a $500 compass) or a newer and more expensive boat.

Those that can afford yachts will be required to do so...it's only fair. The government will also decide the name for each boat. Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines (taxes according to the Supreme Court) and possible imprisonment.

Government officials are exempt from this new law. If they want a boat, they and their families can obtain boats free, at the expense of tax payers. Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.

If the government can force you to buy health care, they can force you to buy a boat....or ANYTHING else.

Yea...it's that stupid...


As Ronald Reagan so wisely stated: "The government IS the problem."

 

[Steve]

there you go again with one of those misleading internet e-mail stories that leaves out the most important part..

those who can't afford their own boat can get a subsidized one ..

yep.. a subsidy it will be a non tax credit.. that's right,.. for every $ of your return you can deduct a percentage of the boat costs..
it isn't much,.. but then they don't pay much in taxes anyways..

oh and the government authorized boat.. available online at the Fed boat exchange pictured below..

and it's only "below" at high tide..

there is even a wind powered version..

a solar powered version..

oops,. ,.. sorry it was high tide when that picture was taken,.. please check back at low tide..

 

[hypocritexposer]

I'd hold out until the AAA came out. (Affordable Airplane Act)

The Affordable Aircraft Act, a new program under development which if enacted will allow every American to own a new approved (and in many cases cost subsidized) airplane. nickname: "Obamaplane".


The U.S. government is contemplating new legislation called "The Affordable Aircraft Act" which declares that every citizen MUST purchase a new aircraft, by April 2016. These "affordable" aircraft will cost an average of $154,000 - $355,000 each. This does not include taxes, hangar fees, licensing and registration fees, nor ongoing costs of fuel, docking, hangar and storage fees, maintenance or repair costs or pilot training.

This law is being drafted, because until now, typically only wealthy and financially responsible people have been able to purchase an aircraft. This new law will ensure that every American can and will now be able to acquire an "affordable" aircraft of their own, because everyone is "entitled" to a new airplane. If you purchase your airplane before the end of 2014, you will receive four "free" life-saving parachutes; not including monthly testing and packing fees.

In order to make sure everyone purchases an affordable airplane, the costs of owning a plane will increase on average of 250-400% per year. Supply and demand may drive operating prices up too as no new airports or airstrips are being contemplated. This way, middle class and wealthy pilots will pay more for something that other people don't want or can't afford to maintain, and will contribute to the "aircraft acquisition subsidy" fund.

But to be fair, people who can't afford to maintain their airplane will be regularly fined.
Children (under the age of 26) can use their parents aircraft to fly to Miami South Beach for R&R and to party until they turn 27; then must purchase their own aircraft.

If you already have an airplane, you can keep yours (just kidding; no you can't).
All substandard aircraft will be crushed and recycled under a companion program "Cash for Crashers".

If you don't want or don't need an aircraft, you are required to buy one anyhow.

If you refuse to buy one or can't afford one, you will be regularly fined $8000 monthly until you purchase one, die trying to learn to fly, or face imprisonment.

Failure to sufficiently use your airplane will also result in fines. People living in the mountains; inner cities or areas with limited or no access to suitable airports or landing/takeoff strips are not exempt. They all must participate if any airport access is possible, including walking to the nearest airstrip or airport.

Age, air sickness, lack of experience & knowledge or lack of desire are not acceptable excuses for not using your airplane.

The only legitimate excuse is if you crash flying or while learning to fly.

A government review board (that doesn't know the difference between a turn and bank indicator and a pitot tube) will decide everything, including when, where, how often and for what purposes you can use your aircraft, along with how many people can ride your aircraft, and determine if one is too old or unhealthy enough to be able to use their aircraft. They will also decide if your airplane has out-lived its usefulness or if you must purchase specific upgrades & accessories, (like a $50000 Cirrus parachute system) or a newer and more expensive airplane.

Those who can afford multi-engine aircraft or jet propulsion will be required to do so...it's only fair.

Failure to comply with these rules will result in fines and possible imprisonment.

Government officials are exempt from this new law.
If they want an airplane, they and their families can obtain new planes free, at the expense of taxpayers.

Unions, bankers and mega companies with large political affiliations ($$$) are also exempt.
Lastly, non governmental private aircraft & pilot organizations such as AOPA and EAA will face new and dreadfully burdensome taxes, penalties and punitive licensing fees.

If the government can force you to buy health care, they can force you to buy an airplane, or ANYTHING else.

http://airnation.net/hangar/threads/the-affordable-aircraft-act-coming-soon.7794/

 

[Big Muddy rancher]

Just think if they had the AHA.

The Affordable Horse Act, could give a home to all the unwanted horses that they won't allow to go to slaughter. :?

 

[Steve]

alright this inteernet things are getting out of hand..

you have choices,.. you can buy a substandard plane you like..
such as this one. .

but you will just have to give it back because it is substandard and crappy.. even if you think you really like it.. cause you don't know better so you have to give it back.. and get a government one..

but the government has planes for you .. lots of them.. just pick one and pay alot for it,.. and you can even get it shipped right to your door step..
here is some of the new Obama planes you can pick from..

see you have lots of choices..

 

[Steve]

Just think if they had the AHA.

The Affordable Horse Act, could give a home to all the unwanted horses that they won't allow to go to slaughter. :?

yep,.. and it will mow your lawn along with your obama goat..

 

[Zilly]

If I already own a boat/plane/horse, will I be able to keep it?

 

[Whitewing]

If I already own a boat/plane/horse, will I be able to keep it?

If you like your boat/plane/horse, you can keep your boat/plane/horse, no one will take them away from you.

 

[Tam]

If I already own a boat/plane/horse, will I be able to keep it?

Silly question :shock: Now if you are allowed to keep yours how do you expect Obama to pay for all those boats, planes and horses he is going to GIVE to his Democrat voters that can't afford them? He needs you to buy new ones so he can pad your bill to help cover the others. :wink:

 

[Zilly]

But...but Whitewing said if I like my boat/plane/horse, I can keep it. Whitewing, did you not know what was in this before you passed it? Figured you would just read it later?

 

[Faster horses]

I just found out I can't keep em...........and it's gonna cost me BIG BUCKS
to replace them with something that doesn't work as good. I like what
I have. Why is the government messing in my private life???? :x :?

 

[Steve]

If I already own a boat/plane/horse, will I be able to keep it?

If you like your boat/plane/horse, you can keep your boat/plane/horse, no one will take them away from you.

you knew that wasn't true.. Just because he already has a boat/plane/horse does not mean he can keep them.. if they do not meet the governments approval.. they must be "cancelled" and as you know ,.. all "individual boat/plane/horse are crappy and substandard and do not have the covered mandates.

this "government" plane has one of the mandated safety devices..

and as you can see it may be a life saver...

a boat with a similar safety device.

not only is the boat safer,.. but some folk have found a way to make them more fun..

and yes it would be silly to put a picture up of a horse with a Obama parachute falling out of the sky..
so I found one with a similar feature "installed" by a goverment worker.. so show how this is done..

sure it doesn't look as safe as the others,..
besides everyone knows liberal Obama horses have wings so if you fall from the sky while riding one it can just fly to safety.