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The Nominations for the 1st Annual Political Oscars Are In!

hypocritexposer

Well-known member
"Washington is a Hollywood for ugly people. Hollywood is a Washington for the simpleminded."
- John McCain

In the category of "Best performance for (unintentional) low comedy in high places", the nominees are:

1. Joe Biden as one example why the Vice Presidency is "not worth a bucket of warm s*it" in "I Didn't Know He Was Loaded"
2. Barack Obama for his touching tribute to Special Olympians in "Barry Obama Can't Bowl!"
3. Hillary Clinton for inadvertently describing the real theme of the Obama presidency: "overcharge" not "reset" in "(Diplomatic) Mission Impossible"
4. Michelle Obama for her sage advice in the choice of gifts given to Gordon Brown and Queen Elizabeth in "The Unthinkable Michelle Obama"

~

In the category of "Best Continuing Performance In A Comedy, Farce or Official Duties", the nominees are:

1. Obama Press Secretary Robert Gibbs for "Say Anything"
2. Rep. Alan Grayson (D-FL) for "Support Mental Health or I'll Kill You!"
3. Eric Holder in "Abbott & Costello Meet Khalid Sheik Mohammed"
4. Secretary of State Hillary Clinton in "The Invisible Womyn"

In the category of "Best Impersonation of Nero Fiddling While Rome Burns", the nominees are:

1. Barack Obama as "Hamlet, Prince of Afghanistan": "To Surge or not to Surge; for 8 months, THAT was the question!"
2. Janet Napolitano in "A Clockwork Orange Threat Level": "Danger. No danger. Wait, danger! No, no danger. Well, maybe danger..."
3. NY Governor David Patterson emulating Barack Obama making a decision in "Oh, My Darling Senator Caroline"
4. Barack Obama for his repeated failed attempts to arrest Iran's nuclear program in "Mahmoud Ahmadinejad Goes Fission"

In the category of "Best Demonstration of Obsequiousness in a Foreign Country", the nominees are:

1. Barack Obama for "I wasn't bowing to the king, I was picking my ego up off the floor" in "The Saudi King and I"
2. Barack Obama for "I wasn't bowing to the emperor, I just didn't want to throw up on him" in "Thirty Seconds Under Tokyo"
3. Barack Obama for crediting Muslims with inventing algebra, compasses, used cars, garbage bags and most of the modern world in "Five Caves to Cairo"
4. Barack Obama for unilaterally canceling the planned Eastern European missile defense system in return for magic beans in "Gullible's Travels"

In the category of "Best Hiding of a Decline", the nominees are:

1. Micheal Mann and Phil Jones in "The Dog Ate Our Temperature Data"
2. The gang at Recovery.gov for "Curse of the Phantom Congressional Districts"
3. CNN for their explanation of their last-place ratings in "Broadcast Non-News": "Just because nobody's tuned to our channel, it doesn't mean they aren't watching"
4. CBS, NBC, CNN, et al for their non-coverage of Obama's lies, gaffes and missteps in "The Greatest Story Never Told"

In the category of "Best Landing After Being Tossed Beneath Obama's Bus", the nominees are:

1. Van Jones for "George Bush blew up the World Trade Center and I'M the one who gets canned!"
2. Anita Dunn for "This wouldn't have happened if I'd said 'Mother Theresa and Che Guevarra'..."
3. Tom Daschle for "I should've tried TurboTax like Timmy suggested"
4. Yosi Sargent for "Nobody complains about art depicting that OTHER God"

In the category of "Best Imitation of a Deer Caught in the Headlights", the nominees are:

1. Nancy Pelosi stammering how the CIA and the Bush Administration hid the truth about Bush-era waterboarding from her in "Lie to Me"
2. Eric Holder struggling to define "torture" to congress in "A Fine Line Between Bathing and Waterboarding"
3. Sonia Sotomayor trying to walk back her clearly leftist judicial philosophy during her confirmation hearings in "The Life and Times of a Wise Latina Womyn"
4. Chris Dodd reacting to questions about favorable mortgage deals in "The Sweetheart of Countrywide"

In the category of "Most Impressive Production of a Spectacular Flop", the nominees are:

1. Barack Obama cluelessly over-hyping of a bag of junk liberal programs in "The Amazing Colossal Stimulus"
2. Harry Reid exerting gargantuan effort to produce a turd healthcare bill, in an adaptation of the poet Virgil's "The mountains are in labor; a ridiculous mouse will be born."
3. Nancy Pelosi forcing the political poison of "Crap n' Charade" and "PelosiCare" down the throats of whimpering centrist Democrats in "Speaker Pelosi and the Blue Dogs That Didn't Bark"
4. David Axelrod and David Plouffe for foisting a self-righteous Marxist clown on a nation which soon came to long for the good ol' days of Jimmy "Peanuts" Carter in "I Can't Believe You Ate The Whole Thing!"

In the category of "Best Rendition of Hypocrisy, Global Warming Edition", the nominees are:

1. Al Gore for the mysteriously canceled "Give Al Gore $1200 And Watch Him Shake Hands With An Idiot" event in Copenhagen
2. Prince Charles for selflessly flying himself and a small army of staffers to Copenhagen to condemn global warming
3. Ed Begley for deftly explaining to Stuart Varney why the modern technique of "peer review" beats archaic empirical method any old day
4. Hugo Chavez for the amazing scientific discovery that giving him lotsa money helps stop climate change

In the category of "Most Audacious Self-Dealer of the Year Award", the nominees are:

1. Nancy Pelosi for "Big Ol' Jet Airliner"
2. Barack and Michelle Obama in "We Flew All the Way to Copenhagen and All We Got Is This Lousy 'Rio Olympics' T-Shirt!"
3. Max Baucus for "Mr Blitzed Goes to Washington"
4. Al Franken for "Stuart Smalley Steals a Senate Seat"

Cited for Posthumous Award:

* The Late Ted Kennedy for his roles in "The Swimmer", "The Best Beers of Our Lives" and "Raging Bullsh*t"

Nominated for Special Award:

* Louis Caldera for his convincing portrayal of the fall guy responsible for the unannounced April 2009 NYC flyover in "The Sound of Airplanes"

Honorable Mentions

* Sen. Ben Nelson (D-NE) for his hilarious parody of a man of principle in "For A Few Dollars More"
* Sen. Mary Landrieu (D-LA) for her hilarious parody of a womyn of principle in "The Best Little Whorehouse in Washington"
* Rep. Barney Frank (D-MA) for an utterly unconvincing portrayal of a politician concerned about fiscal stability in "Who's Minding the Mint? Nobody!"

And the winners are....


Well, we won't know who the winners are until the Academy votes and stuff, and that won't be for a couple of months yet. But, in a real sense, the American People are the winners here, doncha think?
 
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