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Top 8 Morons of 2006

montana cowgurl

Well-known member
Wow...and I thought I had problems! haha these are great, copied them off of realtree.com




TOP 8 MORONS OF 2006

1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter
who's lacking intelligence.



2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please come out and give yourself up."


3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.






4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.





5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot", the man shouted, "that's not what I said!".






6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??? A man spoke frantically into the phone: "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart". "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man
shouted, "This is her husband!"








7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun. Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
(hellooooooo)!






8. THE GRAND FINALE!!! Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat, going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong.
A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so har d.

NOW REMEMBER...THIS IS TRUE.
Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer!
 

Soapweed

Well-known member
Big Muddy rancher said:
jigs said:
just solidifies my theory that stupid people shouldn't breed!

Hey Jigs at least we didn't make the list. :wink:

Reminds me of a cartoon idea that I had one time but never drew up. It would be of a goofy dumb hippy-looking pair of lovebird high school kids walking hand-in-hand towards the school house door. The gal would be noticeably pregnant. A couple of old cowboys are observing, and one cowboy says to the other, "Looks like the only test he could pass would be his fertility test." I hereby relinquish all rights to the above mentioned politically incorrect cartoon, if anyone else would want to illustrate it. :wink:
 

jigs

Well-known member
Big Muddy rancher said:
jigs said:
just solidifies my theory that stupid people shouldn't breed!

Hey Jigs at least we didn't make the list. :wink:
just give me time and I bet I can make that list.

I thank my wife for being the grounding rod that has saved me from that list....with out her, I would be a freak on a leash!
 

the_jersey_lilly_2000

Well-known member
HeHeHe.....in a neighboring lil town there's a building that once housed the bank. I'm talkin.....20 or so years ago. The bank building still has the brass letters on the front. But other than that, it doesn't really strike me as looking like a bank anymore...since in the drive thru there are gates on each side...housing a couple trucks and a boat. It's a residence now, has pot plants in each of the windows that face the road..... Not what I'd want for a home...but the folks that own it are happy. Last week....someone tried to rob the bank....from the road LOL....They came up and tried to open the front door, when it was found locked...they began shooting at the windows. LOL Apparently the robbers weren't from our area.
 

ranchwife

Well-known member
ya know...lists like this one just simply make one feel pretty danged good!!!......knowing that there are folks out there truly dumber than dirt!!
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 

jigs

Well-known member
ranchwife said:
ya know...lists like this one just simply make one feel pretty danged good!!!......knowing that there are folks out there truly dumber than dirt!!
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

that is a rather rude statement.... it could hurt the dirts feelings! :wink:
 
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