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What kids hear

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Soapweed

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These came in an e-mail this morning:

You don't know how true these are. When kids used to tell me things that went on in their homes, I'd have to salt some of them down a bunch. I used to tell parents I wouldn't believe everything I heard about home if they didn't believe everything they heard about school.


What Kids Hear...

When my twin daughters were young, I taught them to say a prayer before going to bed. As I listened outside their door, I could hear them say "Give us this steak and daily bread, and forgive us our mattresses." My husband and I always had a good laugh over this. That was over 50 years a go, and the memory remains in my heart.

From San Francisco, CA: When I was a child, I learned a prayer as Our Father, who are in Heaven, Howard be thy name." I always thought that was God's real name.

Groton MA: My mother spent her early childhood saying, "Hail Mary , full of grapes."

Missoula MT: My son, who is in nursery school, said, "Our Father, who art in Heaven, how didja know my name?" (Love this one!)

Uniontown OH: I remember thinking a prayer was "Give us this day our jelly bread."

Covina CA~ I recall reading something years ago about the Pledge of Allegiance. Some child thought it began, "I led the pigeons to the flag."

Cleveland OH ~ When I was little, I often wondered who Richard Stands was. You know, "I pledge allegiance to the flag. and to the republic for Richard Stands."

Schenectady NY ~ I once knew a child whose favorite Sunday school song was "Gladly, the cross-eyed Bear."

Tampa FL ~When my husband was six years old, he thought the Apostles Creed said "He suffered under a bunch of violets." The real words were under Pontius Pilate," To this day, we still snicker in church whenever that creed is read.

Lake Forest Park WA ~ When I was a little girl, we sang a song in Sunday school about Noah. Part of the chorus was "And the rains came down , and the floods came up." We lived next door to a couple of charming little girls who always sang this song while playing in their garden. Their words were, "And the rains came down, and the spuds came up."

Grand Junction CO ~ When I was younger, I believed the line was Lead a snot into temptation." I thought I was praying for my little sister to get into trouble. I remember once hearing a little boy singing God Bless America. He sang "Stand beside her and guide her through the night with a light from a bulb."

I had to show my 8 year old daughter the song in the Church Hymnal before she would believe it was "Oh, Come All Ye Faithful" and not "Oh, Connie be Faithful."

Does this remind you of the ham song? Was to be "O Little Town of Bethle-ham" when I was in first grade.

Soapweed speaking: After watching the movie Paint Your Wagon back in 1970, I bought the soundtrack for it. It wasn't sung by the original movie singers but by another group which sang considerably more on key. I couldn't figure out the line, "everyone except Michael Winston and me." After mentioning this dilema to a friend and wondering who Michael Winston was, she said it goes, "everyone except by coincidence, me." Okay. :shock: :)
 

the_jersey_lilly_2000

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Heck it's NOT ONLY KIDS!!!! Yesterday I was up at the school, went to talk to the Art Teacher about printing a photo book and how to bind it, we got to talkin about the Photo Editing programs we use, School has used photo elements 2.0 for several years, that's why I ended up gettin that one, because my oldest had worked with it at school and could help me out. Anyway, she said she'd just bought a new one........"Photo Elements for Porno".......I stood there a minute. And said, "Photo Elements...what?"
She said, "Photo Elements for porno".......by this time I'm laffin and can't hardly talk, and she looked at me and asked, "What's so funny?" I said, "Well, I know I"m not hearin what your saying the right way, but it sounds like your sayin, Photo Elements for Porno"....she cracked up, we both stood there laffin and finally she said......"Photo Elements 4.0" :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:
 

nr

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"Well, I know I"m not hearin what your saying the right way, but it sounds like your sayin, Photo Elements for Porno"....she cracked up, we both stood there laffin and finally she said......"Photo Elements 4.0"

I noticed a few years back that if I misunderstood someone's words it would often sound to me like a nursing term or some word from what I'd been currently reading or pondering. The brain is trying to sift and make sense out of gibberish. So Jersey, what have you been reading?! :D :wink:
 

Juan

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One of my sisters older girls was trying to teach her little sister The Lords Prayer,when she got to the"give us this day our daily bread "the little one said "To heck with it I'm not hungry.Let's go play". :lol: :lol:
 

Nicky

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Can't remember who sang these these songs.

A teenage friend thought that it was 'Should've asked her Pastor' instead of ' Should've asked her faster'

Instead of 'Dust on the bottle'.... 'Dust on the Bible'
 

the_jersey_lilly_2000

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LOL I aint been readin NONE of that!!!! It was just the way she talks, and how she runs things together, I kid you not, after her repeatin it several times it still sounded like what I was hearin.
 

Soapweed

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Kind of like the Texas lady who told another gal, "I see you have PSDS."

"What?" the other lady asked.

The Texas gal repeated her statement, but with no luck again. She finally fingered her ear lobe and the other lady this time understood, "Oh, you mean pierced ears." :wink:
 

CattleRMe

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Ever play that game where a group sits in a circle one whispers a phrase in the first persons ear and it goes all around the circle? Most of the time the phrase the last person gets isn't like what the first person said. Proves the point don't always believe what you hear.
 

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