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Ranchers.net

You can say 110 degrees without fainting...

You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off...

You can make instant sun tea...

You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron...

The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly...

You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car...

You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window...

You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance...

Hot water now comes out of both taps...

It's noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets...

You actually burn your hand opening the car door...

You break a sweat the instant you step outside...at 7:30 a.m. before work...

No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning...

Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?...

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state...

When you're from Texas, people that you meet ask you questions like, Do you have any cows?" "Do you have horses?" "Bet you got a bunch of guns, eh?"

They all want to know if you've been to Southfork. They watched Dallas.

Have you ever looked at a map of the world? Look at Texas with me just for a second. That picture, with the Panhandle and the Gulf Coast, and the Red River and the Rio Grande is as much a part of you as anything ever will be.. As soon as anyone anywhere in the world looks at it they know what it is. It's Texas. Pick any kid off the street in Japan and draw him a picture of Texas in the dirt and he'll know what it is. What happens if I show you a picture of any other state? You might get it maybe after a second or two, but who else would? And even if you do, does it ever stir any feelings in you?

In every man, woman and child on this planet, there is a person who wishes just once he could be a real live Texan and get up on a horse or ride off in a pickup. There is some little bit of Texas in everyone.

Did you ever hear anyone in a bar go, "Wow...so you're from Iowa? Cool, tell me about it?" Do you know why? Because nobody gives a **** about Iowa.

Texas is the Alamo. Texas is 183 men standing in a church, facing thousands of Mexican nationals, fighting for freedom, who had the chance to walk out and save themselves, but stayed instead to fight and die for the cause of freedom. We send our kids to schools named William B. Travis and James Bowie and Crockett and do you know why? Because those men saw a line in the sand and they decided to cross it and be heroes. John Wayne paid to do the movie himself. That is the Spirit of Texas.

Texas is Sam Houston capturing Santa Ana at San Jacinto.

Texas is "Juneteenth" and Texas Independence Day.

Texas is huge forests of Piney Woods like the Davy Crockett National Forest.

Texas is breathtaking mountains in the Big Bend.

Texas is the unparalleled beauty of bluebonnet fields in the Texas Hill Country.

Texas is the beautiful, warm beaches of the Gulf Coast of South Texas.

Texas is the shiny skyscrapers in Houston and Dallas.

Texas is world record bass from places like Lake Fork.

Texas is Mexican food like nowhere else, not even Mexico.

Texas is the Fort Worth Stockyards, Bass Hall, the Ballpark in Arlington and the Astrodome.

Texas is larger-than-life legends like Michael DeBakey, Denton Cooley, Willie Nelson, Buddy Holly, Waylon Jennings, Janis Joplin, Kris Kristofferson, Tom Landry, Darrell Royal, Rick Husband, Eric Dickerson, Earl Campbell, Nolan Ryan, Sam Rayburn, and Lyndon B.Johnson.

Texas is great companies like Dell Computer, Texas Instruments and Compaq. And LOCKHEED MARTIN AEROSPACE, Home of the F-16 Jet Fighter and the JSF Fighter.

Texas is NASA.

Texas is huge herds of cattle and miles of crops.

Texas is skies blackened with doves, and fields full of deer.

Texas is the 24 hr restuarant that caters to your ever needs,
and after you're done eating you find yourself saying.....what a burger..then you look outside..you see the orange and white W and it reads....WHATABURGER...and you only find that in texas

Texas is a place where towns and cities shut down to watch the local High School Football game on Friday nights and for the Cowboys on Monday Night Football, and for the Night In Old San Antonio River Parade in San Antonio. Texas is ocean beaches, deserts, lakes and rivers, mountains and prairies, and modern cities.

If it isn't in Texas, you probably don't need it.

NO ONE DOES ANYTHING BIGGER OR BETTER THAN IT'S DONE IN TEXAS.

By federal law, Texas is the only state in the U.S. that can fly its flag at the same height as the U.S. flag. Think about that for a second. You fly the Stars and Stripes at 20 feet in Maryland, California, or Maine and your state flag, whatever it is, goes at 17 feet. You fly the Stars and Stripes in front of Pine Tree High in Longview or anyplace else at 20 feet, the Lone Star flies at the same height - 20 feet. Do you know why? Because it is the only state that was a republic before it became a state.

Also, being a Texan is as high as being an American down here. Our capitol is the only one in the country that is taller than the capitol building in Washington, D.C. and we can divide our state into five states at any time if we wanted to! We included these things as part of the deal when we came on. That's the best part, right there.

Texas even has its own power grid!!

Armadillos sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air.

Roadrunners don't say "Beep Beep"

There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live inTexas.

There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live inTexas, plus a couple no one's seen before.

Possums will eat anything.

Raccoons will test your crop of melons and let you know when they are ripe.

If it grows, it sticks. If it crawls, it bites.

Nothing will kill a mesquite tree.

There are valid reasons some people put concertina wire around their house.

You cannot find a country road without a curve from corner to corner.

A tractor is NOT an all-terrain vehicle, they do get stuck.

The wind blows at 90 MPH from Oct. 2 until June 25, then it stops totally until Oct 2.

Onced and Twiced are good words.

It is not a shopping cart it is a buggy.

Fire ants consider your flesh as a picnic.

Graduating 1st in your class means you left in the 8th grade.

"Coldbeer" actually is one word.

People really grow and eat okra.

Green grass DOES burn.

When you live in the country, you don't have to buy a dog. City people drop them off at your gate in the middle of the night.

When a buzzard sits on the fence and stares at you, it's time to go to the doctor.

"Fixinto" is one word.

The word dinner is confusing. There's only lunch and then there's supper.

Backards and forards means I know everything about you.

"Je'eet"? is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat?"

You work until you're done or it's too dark to see.

You measure distance in minutes.

You've had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.

Stores don't have bags; they have sacks.

You know what "cow tipping" and "snipe hunting" is.

You only own four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup, and Picante.

You think sexy lingerie is a tee shirt and boxer shorts.

You think that the first day of deer season is a national holiday.

You know which leaves make good toilet paper.

You know all four seasons: Almost summer, summer, Still summer, and Christmas.

There is a Dairy Queen in every town with a population over 1000.

Going to Walmart is a favorite past-time known as "goin wal-martin" or off to "Wally World."

You describe the first cool snap (below 70 degrees) as good chili weather.

A carbonated soft drink isn't a soda, cola, or pop .. it's a Coke, regardless of brand or flavor.

You know someone who ate the 72 oz steak and got it for free.

You prefer Whataburger to McDonalds.

You know whether another Texan is from South, West, East, North, or Central Texas as soon as they open their mouth.

Your Pastor wears boots

The Blue Book value on your truck goes up and down depending on how much gas it has in it.
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