NEW WORDS FOR 2005-
Essential additions for the workplace vocabulary:
BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing
why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible.
SEAGULL MANAGER: A manager, who flies in, makes a lot
of noise, craps on everything, and then leaves.
ASSMOSIS: The process by which some people seemto absorb success
and advancement by kissing up to the boss rather than working hard.
SALMON DAY: The experience of spending an entire day
swimming upstream only to get screwed and die in the end....
CUBE FARM: An office filled with cubicles.
PRAIRIE DOGGING: When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm
and people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on.
MOUSE POTATO: The on-line, wired generation's answer to the couch potato.
SITCOMs: Single Income, Two Children, Oppressive Mortgage. What yuppies turn into
when they have children and one of them stops working to stay home with the kids.
STRESS PUPPY: A person who seems to thrive on being stressed out and whiny.
SWIPEOUT: An ATM or credit card that has been rendered useless because the
magnetic strip is worn away from extensive use.
XEROX SUBSIDY: Euphemism for swiping free photocopies from one's workplace.
IRRITAINMENT: Entertainment and media spectacles that are annoying but you
find yourself unable to stop watching them. The O. J. trials were a prime example.
PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE: The fine art of whacking the crap out of an
electronic device to get it to work again.
ADMINISPHERE: The rarefied organizational layers beginning just above the rank and file.
Decisions that fall from the adminisphere are often profoundly inappropriate or irrelevant to
the problems they were designed to solve.
404: Someone who's clueless. From the World Wide Web error message "404 Not Found,"
meaning that the requested document could not be located.
GENERICA: Features of the American landscape that are exactly the same no matter
where one is, such as fast food joints, strip malls, subdivisions...
OHNOSECOND: That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just
made a BIG mistake.
WOOFYS: Well Off Older Folks.