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Easy girls this is in fun!

G

George

Well-known member
Joined
May 29, 2005
Messages
2,344
Location
Indiana
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VERY BRAVE MEN'S JOKES

1. How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry her.
2.What's the difference between a woman and a battery?
A battery has a positive side.
3.Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist?
Cause you can easily fit another pair of breasts there.
4.Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those evolutionary things that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
5.Why do men die before their wives?
Because they want to.
6.Why do women fake orgasms?
Cause they think men care.
7.How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?
Put a nipple on it.
8.What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing she's already been told twice.
9.If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen what are you doing wrong?
You made her chain too long.
10.Why is a laundromat the wrong place to pick up women?
Cause if they can't afford a washing machine they'll probably be unable to support you.
11.If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door who do you let in first?
Your dog cause he'll shut up once you let him in.
12.Why do men pass more gas than woman?
Because women don't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
 
Obviously George, you haven't heard my joke to counter jokes like you
posted. :P
So here it is one more time:



EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY





After three weeks in the Garden of Eden, God came to visit Eve. So, how is everything going? inquired God.



It is all so beautiful, God, she replied. The sunrises and sunsets are breathtaking, the smells, the sights, everything is wonderful, but I have just one problem.



It's these 3 breasts you have given me. The middle one pushes the other two out and I am constantly knocking them with my arms, catching them on branches and snagging them on bushes. They're a real pain.



And Eve went on to tell God that since many other parts of her body came in pairs, such as her limbs, eyes, ears, etc. She felt that having only two breasts might leave her body more symmetrically balanced .



That's a fair point, replied God, But it was my first shot at this, you know. I gave the animals six breasts, so I figured that you needed only half of those, but I see that you are right. I will fix it up right away.



And God reached down, removed the middle breast and tossed it into the bushes.



Three weeks passed and God once again visited Eve in the Garden of Eden.



Well, Eve, how is my favorite creation?



Just fantastic, she replied, But for one oversight. You see, all the animals are paired off. The ewe has a ram and the cow has her bull. All the animals have a mate except me. I feel so alone.



God thought for a moment and said, You know, Eve, you are right. How could I have overlooked this? You do need a mate and I will immediately create a man from a part of you. Let's see....where did I put that useless boob?



Now doesn't THAT make more sense than all that crap about the rib?
 

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