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I didn't do it.

CattleArmy

Well-known member
Joined
Sep 29, 2006
Messages
3,633
A man came home from work and found his three children outside, still
in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers
strewn all around the front yard.

The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house
and there was no sign of the dog. Proceeding into the entry, he found
an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was
wadded against one wall.

In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the
family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing.

In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on
the counter, the fridge door was open wide, dog food was spilled on the
floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was
spread by the back door.

He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of
clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she might be ill, or that
something serious had happened.

He was met with a small trickle of water as it made its way out the
bathroom door. As he peered inside he found wet towels, scummy soap and
more toys strewn over the floor. Miles of toilet paper lay in a heap
and toothpaste had been smeared over the mirror and walls.

As he rushed to the bedroom, he found his wife still curled up in the
bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and
asked how his day went.

He looked at her bewildered and asked, "What happened here today?" She
again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from
work and you ask me what in the world I do all day?" "Yes," was his
incredulous reply. She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it."
 
now if a man stayed home and did nothing, there wouldn't be a big fuss..... you gals make up this stuff...just like saying how tough it is during child birth..... you never hear us complain about putting the baby in there in the first place do ya??? heck no!
 
see, that is my point! we put it in ther with no complaints, and you gals make a big deal about getting it out!! gravity baby, just stand up and it should fall right out......but you guys lay down, and need breaks in between pushin..... :???:
 
young gun said:
I think jigs is trying to ruffle a few feathers :shock:
I doute it young gun....Jigs isn't one to ruffle feathers,just not in his character :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :cry2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:
 
thank you Mrs. Greg........ for seeing that I speak only the truth, and am a wise man........
 
jigs said:
thank you Mrs. Greg........ for seeing that I speak only the truth, and am a wise man........


OMG...this last post made me faint!!!!



From lack of oxygen from laffin' so hard!!!! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
 
Jigs somehow I can beleive Kalo loses oxygen from laughing so hard at your romantic reandevous.............. :wink: :)
 
CattleArmy said:
Jigs somehow I can beleive Kalo loses oxygen from laughing so hard at your romantic reandevous.............. :wink: :)

well bring you a roll of saran wrap, a jug of Aunt Jamima pancake syrup, and a bag of mini marshmallows, and see for yourself........it ain't the Ringling Brothers, but I do my best to entertain. I had to quit the gymnastics though.....did a triple back flip with a twist for Katrina, forgot to adjust for the wind, and had a bad landing.....
 
jigs said:
CattleArmy said:
Jigs somehow I can beleive Kalo loses oxygen from laughing so hard at your romantic reandevous.............. :wink: :)

well bring you a roll of saran wrap, a jug of Aunt Jamima pancake syrup, and a bag of mini marshmallows, and see for yourself........it ain't the Ringling Brothers, but I do my best to entertain. I had to quit the gymnastics though.....did a triple back flip with a twist for Katrina, forgot to adjust for the wind, and had a bad landing.....

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
 
jigs said:
CattleArmy said:
Jigs somehow I can beleive Kalo loses oxygen from laughing so hard at your romantic reandevous.............. :wink: :)

well bring you a roll of saran wrap, a jug of Aunt Jamima pancake syrup, and a bag of mini marshmallows, and see for yourself........it ain't the Ringling Brothers, but I do my best to entertain. I had to quit the gymnastics though.....did a triple back flip with a twist for Katrina, forgot to adjust for the wind, and had a bad landing.....



That explains why she's been quiet.....did ya land on her?
 
jigs said:
CattleArmy said:
Jigs somehow I can beleive Kalo loses oxygen from laughing so hard at your romantic reandevous.............. :wink: :)

well bring you a roll of saran wrap, a jug of Aunt Jamima pancake syrup, and a bag of mini marshmallows, and see for yourself........it ain't the Ringling Brothers, but I do my best to entertain. I had to quit the gymnastics though.....did a triple back flip with a twist for Katrina, forgot to adjust for the wind, and had a bad landing.....

Oh the temptation of Kansas now.............haven't had a good laugh for awhile. :D :D :D
 
Good Lord! That joke reminds me of the show Pure Country was on! Help me, Mrs. G, what was it called? Watched it all, and couldn't believe how some of those men couldn't handle things around the home with the kids while their women were gone. Pure Country did just fine though.
 
Shelly said:
Good Lord! That joke reminds me of the show Pure Country was on! Help me, Mrs. G, what was it called? Watched it all, and couldn't believe how some of those men couldn't handle things around the home with the kids while their women were gone. Pure Country did just fine though.
The Week The Women Went....and yup I noticed the country boys looked after there kids and home WAY better then the townies did....too close to next door neighbors BBQ :D

Pure did awesome :-)
 

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