A Column
There is a calamity that strikes abject terror into the hearts of cattlemen.
People who raise cattle are subjected and conditioned to many adversities, from sickness and death in the herd, to drought, low return for cattle sold and high operating costs. But the most sudden and devastating thing that can happen, which threatens to cause a rancher to lose control of his senses, is losing the calving book.
I'm not talking about the ledger in which herd records are kept, which every cattleman should diligently keep up to date, (or at least those without computers in which records are kept), but the little shirt pocket sized booklet in which he records on the site birth of calves, the matching numbers of the cow and calf ear tags, the sex of the calf and sometimes the weight.
That booklet is safely ensconced within a shirt pocket, along with a ballpoint pen or stub pencil, throughout calving season. It is relocated into a new pocket with each changing of shirts and, if it becomes lost it causes instant panic, a thorough search of house, barns and corrals and much hollering at wife and kids until it is found. If it isn't retrieved it literally messes his whole calving operation up.
I am not calving cows now but I fastidiously carried my calving record book in my left shirt pocked when I was, and I had the misfortune of losing it several times. I think I always found it after much anxiety and searching. One time I distinctly remember, after looking everywhere I thought it could possibly be, more than once, I discovered I had put it in the washer, still in the pocket of my dirty shirt. After I found it, after it had gone through the wash and rinse cycle, and with much apprehension and trepidation, I gingerly peeled it open to discover that I could decipher the entries, not clearly but, "praise the Lord" they could still be read. Talk about jubilation, my calving season was saved.
Seems I have had a penchant for putting things in the washer that shouldn't be put in the washer. I have thourghly washed an assortment of bolts, nuts and screws, ballpoint pens, candy, coins and a billfold, along with its contents, at least twice. Doesn't hurt things like drivers licenses that are laminated in plastic, and credit cards. It surely doesn't do the various sundry of assorted papers containing names addresses and phone numbers any good, or the wallet… especially leather ones.
And the stuff you hear about laundered money has a whole other different meaning.