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Canadian baseball players have BSE?

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Well-known member
Feb 10, 2005
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Montgomery, Al
Thursday, July 28, 2005
First Case of Mad Cow in Canadian Baseball Player
7/25/2005 - Steve Tanner
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One new case of mad cow disease, or bovine spongiform encephalopathy(BSE), was announced Friday near Toronto. The unnamed player has been placed on the DL and quarantined until further tests can be done.

"We want to be sure he has not infected other steroid using athletes." Says Dr Raymond Russ, lead researcher with the The MLB Bovine and Ball Player Pathology and Sanitation Study and Research Laboratory

"The use of steroids has opened up athletes to all sorts of new medical conditions." Said Dr. Russ. "Spongiform Encephalopathy, Dermatophilosis, Trypanosomiasis, as well as medical conditions such as multiple stomachs and urges to graze on outdoor stadiums. Toronto has a synthetic turf system so there are no cases there."

Bud Selig has expressed his concern over the spread of Mad Cow disease throughout the league, but also felt it would at no time affect any revenue acquired by the owners, or himself.

"Baseball will be business and usual."

A dozen of potential infected players will be euthanatized and destroyed in conformity with the current rules under MLB, Selig added.

Canadians fear this will hurt the exporting of players to the U.S.

Canadians have already received a black eye over the beef industry, the anti-American stance and Celine Dion.

A complete list of current players with the disease will be release after testing has been confirmed. Currently no American players have been diagnosed with Mad Cow" Concluded Dr. Russ

"Barry Bonds most certainly does not have Mad Cow disease, he is just an asshole."

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