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I don't get it

B

burnt

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Joined
Feb 28, 2008
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Mid-western Ontario
It started out as a simple little project that involved bringing the cows up to the barn this morning and pulling out a few culls. The job seemed pretty straight forward. No need to get riled up about anything because we have a pretty airtight setup since we got the new barn up last year.

So, from the barnyard I holler "co' boss, co' boss " and they hear me and head up from the little bush where they hang out until feeding time. Nice to have such cooperative old girls. And in they come to the yard.

Well I had most of the keeper cows cut off and sent back out of the yard before I saw wifey head to the chicken coop to tend to her henny pennies.

I hollered at her "Can you help me make the last cut and sort when you're done feeding your hens"? "Sure", she said, "as soon as I get the right clothes on". "Those look good enough to me" I said and that earned a sharp glare.

Shoulda known right them that not all was well and I'd have to watch my tongue. So, the less words the better. I'm a quick learner.

So by the time she gets back, seemed like forever to me, I had a lot of the good cows pulled out of the barn and the ones that were left were getting a bit cagey. The ones I wanted to ship wanted out and the ones I wanted out were always heading back to the bale feeder.

Sent one more out and looked the rest over and realized that one old swing bag was missing. Looked out and saw that she was the last one that I had sent out so I goes scrambling across the slippery snow and headed her off before she went out the gate. Lucky enough for me.

Got her back in and started working the last two good cows out of the bunch and after a bit of dodging and silent arm flailing got one more headed toward the door. Just about had her through it when dearest wifey jumps in front of her and heads her back into the group of culls.

What the heck are you doing I holler. "Well, she says, I asked you if you want her out and you didn't answer!!!" "Well I had her heading for the door didn't I and so I figured you would know that I wanted her OUT!"

"I CAN'T READ YOUR MIND" she says back pretty forceful like and I start to answer "well I . . ." but immediately thought better of it and bit my tongue. Oh the long-suffering that I've developed . . . . if I say something it might be wrong, if I don't say something it will be wrong too? :???:

She muttered something about the one before that I had to bring back and so she thought I was trying to get ahead of this one to read the tag number . . . well that last one was just a mistake, I was gonna say, but it seemed like the less said the better.

I just don't get it, so many times she comes up with something just before I think to say it but she can't figure out when I'm trying to do a simple thing like chase a particular cow out of the sort pen . . .

Oh well, it all turned out good, we got the sort done and the culls shipped and then it was time for lunch. And I got served with with a beautiful bowl of barley stew instead of hot tongue and cold shoulder.

Life is good, even when I don't always get it..

:)
 
What is worse is when they "help" right before herd health and do not listen ,even though you have done the exact same routine 50 million times before, you still have to explain step by step like they are children ,or worse. Our vet knows when this has happened and always responds "boy, it sure is chilly here today." even when it is 30 degrees out ...Usually hubby and I end up talking to each other half way through preg checking and all is forgotten until the next time.. :lol:

I feel your pain Burnt.. :wink:
 
I clipped this out of a paper several years ago...I believe the lady that wrote it used to post here....what a wise woman!!!....anyone who is married should read and also have your spouse read.....this means you Burnt!!!!!!!!!!!!! maybe it will "help" you to understand :roll: :wink:



Ranching sign language is universal
by Julie Carter

The rancher's wife stands at the gate waiting for him to make up his mind which direction he is going to go with the small herd of cattle he's bringing to the pens. She sees him, look at the cattle that are trotting a little faster than he's like and then glance at her, but say nothing. With a long established telepathy, she knows by watching him that she's got the wrong gate open, even though its the one he told her to have ready. She slams her gate and runs - as fast as boots spurs and chaps will let her- to the other gate that is now the one they need open.
The language that is spoken and more often not spoken at the ranch requires visual skills as well as interpretive ones. Then there are some days the meaning comes through loud and clear.
Cattle and horses speak to their owners through patterns and nature's instincts. A mother cow will eventually give away the location of her hidden new baby if you just quietly watch her trying to not give it away. She will look every direction but the right one until, at one point, she'll glance the way of her calf.
A baby calf, falling behind the herd while you are driving them, will get a look in his eyes that reads: "In the next second, you are going to see me with my tail curled up over my back, eyes glazed over, and leaving to go back to where I came from before you bothered me!"
A horse's ears will perk up to attention while you ride through the brush, and you can bet that he's heard, seen, or smelled something you haven't. If the rider will pay attention, a horse will find more cattle in the brush than a rider will ever see alone.
Ranch husband and wife communications, while pretty much the same across the land, take on a bit more animation, and sometimes humor. Well, its usually funny......later.
While she's chunking rocks at the bulls to get them through the gate and he's hollering it's the wrong gate, or the wrong something, the next rock chunking usually is directly at him...not hard to interpret that!
An old rancher trick is to loudly give the wife instructions that she doesn't nee, but that someone else within hearing does. Rather than offend the "help", he makes her look less than capable and hopes the one who need to hear it does. It usually fails in its intended mission and makes for a few days of SPAM as the main course for meals.
A nod, a whistler, a wave, or a shake of his head speaks an entire language to his partner who most often is also the cook. Better judgment on his part is not always in use when communicating his thoughts. You mean, it didn't say: "For better or worse and for mind reading?"
 
I didn't even make it out of the house before it all broke loose. I had been out twice during the night checking the heifers well about 5 am I asked her to get me up about 7:30.

Well I never made it to bed as I had a sick stomach. The alarm goes off as she walks past the bathroom and heads down stairs. I have been sleeping in the recliner since I have had the shingles.

Well I ease out of the bathroom and get in the bed and cover up all the while I hear her going room to room looking for me. I cant help but lay there and snicker. She goes to the basement opens the front door looking for me. After slamming doors and searching the whole house here she comes up the stairs sounds like she is taking two steps at a time.

I start snoring and all of a sudden she yanks back the cover and growls about that not being funny at all. Well I start down the stairs and start getting dressed to go feed. Shes still brewing over me playing games and I simply say by the way could you turn he dogs out? :???: :???: :???:

Thats when the fight started. :oops:


For about three hours I listen to everything under the sun she is unhappy with. Well I had to ad my two cents. I finally made it out the door at 10 am. I never did figure out what put the burr in her butt! She huffed and puffed all morning and most of the afternoon.

Well about 2 pm I go get the 4 year old grandson at my daughters about 25 miles away. So rather than continue the silent treatment she softens up and starts acting normal again.

Its really amazing how much peace and harmony a child can bring into the domain. :wink:

Well she seems back to normal for now. But I think I WILL Not try any funny stuff for a few days. :oops:
 
Yanuck said:
I clipped this out of a paper several years ago...I believe the lady that wrote it used to post here....what a wise woman!!!....anyone who is married should read and also have your spouse read.....this means you Burnt!!!!!!!!!!!!! maybe it will "help" you to understand :roll: :wink:



Ranching sign language is universal
by Julie Carter

The rancher's wife stands at the gate waiting for him to make up his mind which direction he is going to go with the small herd of cattle he's bringing to the pens. She sees him, look at the cattle that are trotting a little faster than he's like and then glance at her, but say nothing. With a long established telepathy, she knows by watching him that she's got the wrong gate open, even though its the one he told her to have ready. She slams her gate and runs - as fast as boots spurs and chaps will let her- to the other gate that is now the one they need open.
The language that is spoken and more often not spoken at the ranch requires visual skills as well as interpretive ones. Then there are some days the meaning comes through loud and clear.
Cattle and horses speak to their owners through patterns and nature's instincts. A mother cow will eventually give away the location of her hidden new baby if you just quietly watch her trying to not give it away. She will look every direction but the right one until, at one point, she'll glance the way of her calf.
A baby calf, falling behind the herd while you are driving them, will get a look in his eyes that reads: "In the next second, you are going to see me with my tail curled up over my back, eyes glazed over, and leaving to go back to where I came from before you bothered me!"
A horse's ears will perk up to attention while you ride through the brush, and you can bet that he's heard, seen, or smelled something you haven't. If the rider will pay attention, a horse will find more cattle in the brush than a rider will ever see alone.
Ranch husband and wife communications, while pretty much the same across the land, take on a bit more animation, and sometimes humor. Well, its usually funny......later.
While she's chunking rocks at the bulls to get them through the gate and he's hollering it's the wrong gate, or the wrong something, the next rock chunking usually is directly at him...not hard to interpret that!
An old rancher trick is to loudly give the wife instructions that she doesn't nee, but that someone else within hearing does. Rather than offend the "help", he makes her look less than capable and hopes the one who need to hear it does. It usually fails in its intended mission and makes for a few days of SPAM as the main course for meals.
A nod, a whistler, a wave, or a shake of his head speaks an entire language to his partner who most often is also the cook. Better judgment on his part is not always in use when communicating his thoughts. You mean, it didn't say: "For better or worse and for mind reading?"
Click to expand...



"For better or worse and for mind reading?

I even told her once today the BIBLES SAYS for better or worse. I told her to me it meant in sickness and health not running around with a burr up her butt. Well that statement added about 2 hours to the ruckuss. :cry: :cry:

By the way Yanuck a good post but for a few days I an't suggesting she read nothing. :lol:
 
I helped hubby load the truck with wheat yesterday I you guys have to get your poop in a pile.... When you say part the tractor this side of the rock pile that's what I will do.... NO it won't be kiddy corner to the rockpile like you say you did........ AND another thing when loading the front hopper it don't need to be to the front of the third brace..... IT ALL RUNS TO THE BOTTTOME OF THE HOPPER! And..... If I clean the hopper out of the auger, you dang sure better not follow up and do it again behind me... You jsut keep movin on and I'll match ya step for step....
 
My wife works 12 hour shifts 7 pm to 7 am. This morning was the first I've seen her in 4 days we went out for breakfest and then she went to bed and I went to working on my lovely John Deere skidloader.The trick to keeping them off yer back is be gone before they get home and get home once their gone. Turning off your cell phone works also. Mine does'nt get service at the farm so I'm pretty safe.She just left at 6:30 but it's only a 4 hour shift so most likely she'll wake me off the couch to go check heifers.
 
My wife works 12 hour shifts 7 pm to 7 am. This morning was the first I've seen her in 4 days we went out for breakfest and then she went to bed and I went to working on my lovely John Deere skidloader.The trick to keeping them off yer back is be gone before they get home and get home once their gone. Turning off your cell phone works also. Mine does'nt get service at the farm so I'm pretty safe.She just left at 6:30 but it's only a 4 hour shift so most likely she'll wake me off the couch to go check heifers.

You know what they say.... "behind every successful rancher is a wife that works in town!"
 
greg said:
You know what -a border collie doesn't go back to the house?Learned that awhile back
Click to expand...

Mine would, If you cussed her she'd walk to the house go to the corner of the deck lay down and give you the dog finger.
 
Wifes can read your mind except when you need them to, and then they act like you should know "I can't read your mind!" I always think to myself, I'll bet she has a pretty good Idee what I'm thinkin' now! I never say that, though. :lol: :lol: :lol: Good post, Ill bet we all can relate, male or female!
 

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