I was diagnosed with: A.A.A.D.D.

[HAY MAKER]

Recently, I was diagnosed with: A.A.A.D.D. - Age Activated Attention Deficit Disorder.
This is how it manifests:

I decide to water my garden. As I turn on the hose in the driveway, I look over at my car and decide it needs washing. As I start toward the garage, I notice mail on the porch table that I brought up from the mail box earlier.

I decide to go through the mail before I wash the car. I lay my car keys on the table, put the junk mail in the
garbage can under the table, and notice that the can is full.
So, I decide to put the bills back on the table and take
out the garbage first. But then I think, since I'm going to be near the mailbox when I take out the garbage anyway, I may as well pay the bills first.

I take my check book off the table, and see that there is only 1 check left. My extra checks are in my desk in the study, so I go inside the house to my desk where I find the can of Coke I'd been drinking. I'm going to look for my checks, but first I need to push the Coke aside so that I don't accidentally knock it over. The Coke is getting warm, and I decide to put it in the refrigerator to keep it cold.

As I head toward the kitchen with the Coke, a vase of
flowers on the counter catches my eye -- they need water. I put the Coke on the counter and discover my reading glasses that I've been searching for al l morning. I decide I better put them back on my desk, but first I'm going to water the flowers.

I set the glasses back down on the counter, fill a
container with water and suddenly spot the TV remote. Someone left it on the kitchen table. I realize that tonight when we go to watch TV, I'll be looking for the remote, but I won't remember that it's on the kitchen table, so I decide to put it back in the den where it belongs, but first I'll water the flowers. I pour some water in the flowers, but quite a bit of it spills on the floor.

So, I set the remote back on the table, get some towels and wipe up the spill. Then, I head down the hall trying to remember what I was planning to do.

At the end of the day:
- the car isn't washed
- the bills aren't paid
- there is a warm can of Coke sitting on the counter
- the flowers don't have enough water,
- there is still only 1 check in my check book,
- I can't find the remote,
- I can't find my glasses,
- and I don't remember what I did with the car keys.

Then, when I try to figure out why nothing got done today, I'm really baffled because I know I was busy all day, and I'm really tired.

I realize this is a serious problem, and I'll try to get
some help for it, but first I'll check my e-mail.

Do me a favor. Forward this message to everyone you know, because I don't remember who the hell I've sent it to.

Don't laugh -- if this isn't you yet, your day is coming!!
GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. LAUGHING AT YOURSELF IS THERAPEUTIC.

 

[Jinglebob]

Yup! :wink:

 

[Anonymous]

You just about explained how every day goes with me.... Somedays when I go to town, after I get there I forget half the reasons I went in- then I have to take a few minutes at the water hole to see if I can remember them- and after a little while there, I don't care anyway- decide there is always tomorrow...Luckily I still remember where the local watering hole is :wink: :lol:

 

[Faster horses]

Better be careful there, OT. Some day you'll be there and won't know if you just arrived or are ready to leave...

 

[Juan]

The well dressed older gentleman went into the bathroom, walked up to the urinal,unbuttoned his vest,pulled out his tie and peed his pants.

 

[Faster horses]

That's a good Juan! :wink:

 

[Soapweed]

That's funny, Don Juan.

My own older age problem is diminishing eye-sight. I went into Young's Western Wear a year ago, and saw a hundred dollar headstall on sale for $35. That seemed like a heck of a bargain so I bought it, along with a couple shirts and a couple pairs of Wranglers. Didn't check out the bill too close until I got home, and then found that the headstall was sale priced at $85, not the $35 that my eyes told me it was. Wouldn't have bought it had I been wearing my reading glasses.

Just about a month ago, I had one late summer calf that I decided not to wean. It was out of a first calf heifer that I bought last spring. There were twenty-seven new heifers that I bought, so they each got a new yellow Y-Tex ear tag numbered 1 through 25, and I made a couple more Ritchey yellow tags for the other two, grinding in numbers 26 and 27. This late calf went to number 13. I turned the calf back out with the cows.

A few days later, I decided to take a few old cows to a sale, so we sorted them out to load. I had to pick up more cows at Dad's place, so decided to load the heifer and her calf to take over to be with some we're turning into a fall-calving herd. Put the cow and calf on the load, and dumped them out. The next day, Peach Blossom said, "Wasn't the mother of the calf number 13?"

I said, "Yes, I took her over with the calf."

Peachie said, "You took over number 18."

Well, my intentions were good, but it took a couple hours of messing around to rectify my mishap. Sure hate losing my mind along with my eye-sight. :shock: :? Moral: An eight a three is not to be.