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My story and what's next

F

Faster horses

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 11, 2005
Messages
30,475
Location
NE WY at the foot of the Big Horn mountains
To my old friends and new ones on ranchers.net:

This is very hard for me, but here goes.

It is past time to tell you that Mr. FH and I are no longer married.
I had hopes that it could be fixed by now, but that is not the case.
This came to a head around the time that Ranchy and ranchwife were
having their problems and at that time I just didn't want to add another to
the stories being told and the sorrows being shared here.
Plus, I really hoped we could find our way out of this sitation. That was not to be.

So, I have moved to Spearfish, SD. I am attending church regularly, seeking counsel and praying a lot. The worse, I hope, is behind me.

I have kept the Vigortone business in SE Montana and have been
given new territory here in W. South Dakota. If I can be of ANY help
to ranchers in this area, I would welcome the opportunity to work with
you.

I have often thought of writing a book and now might be the time.
I thought about it yesterday and I thought the title should be "SAY NO TO DIVORCE." Of course, that isn't the case for everyone. But I have thought that you spend 2 years of your life getting OVER a divorce, why not spend 2 years working toward a better understanding of each other. It's painful either way, but at least you end up with the same person you started out with--and in a much better relationship (or at least understanding) when you are done.

For any of you that wonder, Mr. FH is a wonderful person. That wasn't the case. How we related to each other was. I wish him the best, I will love him forever.
44 years is a long to time to call it quits. I have not lived without him
since I was 17 years old.

I so appreciate the support I have had, both here and in my personal life.
God Bless you all.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I realize this is not a Self-Help forum, but if you want to have a discussion about self-worth here, I'd sure be interested in your comments.
 
FH, I know this has been a really tuff thing for you. I'll keep you in my thoughts prayers. I think a book would be a wonderful thing for you to do. And if it helped just one couple, it'd be worth it.
 
Hugs202D20Bears.gif




You've been tough Faster,you know my prayers and thoughts are with you. :)
 
Sure sorry to hear this, FH. Peach Blossom and I had the privilege of meeting you and Mr. FH, along with your charming daughter and her husband, at the Black Hills Stock Show three and a half years ago. We were very impressed with all of you, and really enjoyed the visit as we had supper together that evening.

FH, you and your ex-husband are both wonderful people, even if you choose to no longer be married to each other. Our prayers are that you both will find much happiness in the years to come, even though you are traveling in separate directions. Writing a book sounds like a significantly worthwhile way to spend time. You have much wisdom to pass along, and others are bound to benefit from the book you write. Go for it. Please put Peach and I on the list of those who want to buy one when it is done.

FH, we pray for the best for both you and Mr. FH. Surely you have broken some kind of record being married for 44 years without divorcing. That is some accomplishment in itself. :wink: You will both pull through in fine shape, because you have already proved you have staying power. Have a great rest of your life. :-)
 
Not much I can say but "Good Luck" to both of you and I hope things work out for the best all the way around.....

If you just need someone to talk to- remember I'm only as far as an e-mail, or PM, or phone call away-- as well as several hundred more good friends on this site.....Wish you the best....
 
FH...I bet posting this lifted a huge weight off your shoulders. I think everyone here gave you some spectacular advice, especially Soap.

But, I think your own advice and words were the best posted yet.

I think you should take Fulton up on his offer, and although I've told you lots, I'll say it again, you know where we hang our hat, and as is said where I was raised "mi casa es su casa" (my home is your home, for you gringos :wink: )

FH...keep your head up. Everything happens for a reason, sometimes we just don't know why.

Also, if you are looking for a great book to read, check out the Last Lecture. http://www.thelastlecture.com/ It is the best book I've read in a long, long time. Maybe ever. As a matter of fact lazy ace and I are taking a little trip to look at cattle and ponies, then headed to the Red Angus convention. I thought about getting it as a book on tape, but didn't know if he'd go for that or not.

Hang in there kid. When one door closes, another always opens. Just think this door could lead to something even better than the last.

Love always...

TTB :wink:
 
FH, I've wondered often how it was going with you and Mr. FH. Even though we haven't kept in touch much since the winter, I always hoped that it would work out with you two. I have to thank you for sharing with me, and talking and listening to me when I needed somebody. You're one hell of a good lady! I hope that life is good for you from now on. Take care.
 
Get to writing that book girl. It often helps us to better understand our own life when we take the time to arrange our thoughts to write them down on paper. This will get your thoughts out in front of you so that you see why you are where you are. In the final chapter, you can out line where you are going and what you want to do with the rest of your life. Taking your time to write out your planes may surprise you. You may find you want to move in a different direction or do different things once you have made yourself think it through to the destination.
I found after I was divorced after 22 years that a pen pal or an e-mail pal can be helpful. You can think things through as you write and bounce them off a pal that knows you. They may help you recognize when you are lying to yourself of even make you think deeper by asking that you explain cretin details further. Find someone you trust to exchange ideas. Also the time delay of a day for a response is better and allows more focused thinking that a conversation.
I am sorry and will be thinking about you. Please let me know if I can be of assistance.
 
Not much I can say that hasn't been said already -- so sorry to hear this. Divorce is not an easy thing, but as was already said, when one door closes, another opens.

Sometimes it's hard to find the door that just opened so keep your eyes open, chin up, and take a good look around. :wink:

You appear to me to be a woman of integrity and strong will...we wish you the best from here.
 
With the kind words you said of Mr. FH, I'm hoping that bitterness will not be a part of either one of your lives...sounds like to me that you are heading in the right direction and your life together will hold many fond memories and that it will also make you both stronger people...
 
I am kinda new here but my heart goes out to you. When trouble like that comes at ya, it is so easy to let it work on ya and fester and smother the parts of your life that should be happy. But this life is meant to be enjoyed, meant for laughing, meant for sucking the marrow all out from the bones! You take your time, but then you get back to smiling and giggling and loving this crazy experience we call life. I was divorced a long time ago and it allowed me the perspective and insight to fully appreciate and love my wife. She is the best thing that ever happened to me and wouldn't have come into my life without other things coming apart at the seams. After a really difficult and down time, she brought the sun back into my life. Here's to your future and your happiness!!!!!!!
 
:cry2: :cry2: :cry2:


Ahhhhhhhh...you guys and ladies...what can I say?
Thanks for your words of wisdom, for caring, for sharing and for your
support.

My aunt used to write verses for Hallmark cards. I have one of her verses framed on my wall. It serves me well to re-ead it:

"Sometimes you give me a mountain, Lord.
So steep and rugged to climb.
But why should I complain about that
when so many sweet valleys have been mine?"
 
A tough deal I'm sure but your a strong person and will pull thru just fine keep your chin up.

And don't start drinking I did that and wasted about 8 month's of my life pretty much drunk 24/7.
 
sorry to hear that,it musta happened for a reason though,be strong, you have lots of freinds here to lean on
 
I'm sorry to hear you're going through a tough time, and huge adjustment :( . I hope things start to smooth out for you soon. Hopefully you'll find a lot of positives in being single, I know I don't mind it one bit... you can eat directly out of the ice cream container, and you do have a lot of really great freedom :D :wink: . Welcome to the wonderful world of single gals :-) !
 
One thing I have learned is that hurting people hurt people. I commend you. You have gracefully sidestepped that pitfall. Sometimes teribbly bad things happen to awfully nice people. We may never understand them this side of Heaven. God Bless & you are in our prayers.
 
Faster Horses, such a difficult decision and adjustment for you and your family. It sounds like you have a firm support system around you and are relying on it. That must be a big help.

Undoubtedly God's grace will be your best help. He gives insights along the way as we ask for them.
Others may give us advice kindly but it is always our relationship with God that gives us the ultimate and legitimate answers for our individual paths in life. Following those answers can be freeing- how can we condemn ourselves if we followed God's direction?

I think of that sometimes with past decisions I've made after some praying and searching- decisions which have eventually caused some struggles in life I might not have had if I'd gone a different route. The struggles made me question, and others question as well, if I'd done the right thing and made the right choice earlier. All I can say is, well, things may seem murky now but back then at that time at that place in life it seemed the direction I took, as much as I could figure out back then, was God's leading.
There is some comfort in knowing he knows our frail minds and thought processes and loves us even when we're bumbling along in confusion.

I'll be praying you get that emotionally freeing comfort whenever you need it.
Big hugs your way, FH. You are a dear person.
 

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