new (rough spots yet) horse poem

[Jinglebob]

Had this one goin' around in my head for awhile and finally got it thrown together. I need to get the meter better and maybe exchange a few words, but some of the postings here made me think about putting it on here.

The Quest

Athletic, quicksilver, tightly wound springs
Of muscle and blood and bone
All wrapped up in sorrel, bay or dun colored hide
A regal king, up there on his throne

Flexible black hooves, like well tempered steel
Form the base of this elegant equine
Nostrils flair and oxygen goes deep into chest
Powering moves like a frantic feline

I've craved the feel of straddling this steed
Being awash in the dizzying dance
As my partner swoops and sweeps in time to a cow
Mesmerizing me in this tangible trance

For years I've attempted to attain these horses
Who are capable of this graceful glide
By buying and breeding, by hook and by crook
By cheating and chiseling, I've tried

And now they are in my tightfisted clutches
These horses who make the deep tracks
I find that my quest has been finely foiled
I'm too decrepit to stay on their backs!

 

[Jeannie]

What a wonderful poem! You bring the words to life and I can see what is happening in each stanza. Very nice! :clap: :clap:

 

[Saddletramp]

Yeah... the kid does o.k. I guess that's why I like to hang around with him. If you think Ol' Jinglebob can do poetry?.... You ought to hear him sing Cowboy Songs.

Hope to see you over the Fourth, Pardner.

 

[Faster horses]

I liked it, I really liked it.

And you caught me at the end. It was a BOBL!!

 

[Haytrucker]

I'd change the title to "Now that I can afford to, I can't!". Very nice, I admire your origionality. Every time I try to write one, it winds up with three or four "Baxterism's" in it. I almost have one done about the last dog, which hopefully gives me ten years or more to write the one about this dog. Here's to tall grass!!

 

[ranchwife]

I agree with FH....the ending had me rolling!!!! thanks, jinglebob!!!

 

[Jeannie]

Yeah... the kid does o.k. I guess that's why I like to hang around with him. If you think Ol' Jinglebob can do poetry?.... You ought to hear him sing Cowboy Songs.

Hope to see you over the Fourth, Pardner.

Really? That sounds very cool!