gizmom
Well-known member
Even when opportunity knocks, you still have to get off your butt and open the door.
> 1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
> 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
> 3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
> 4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
> 5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
> 6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
> 7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
> 8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
> 9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
> 10. Bad decisions make good stories.
> 11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
> 12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection.. .again.
> 13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
> 14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
>> 16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
>>17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
> 18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
> 19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
> What the heck happened to #20?!!
> 21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
>> 22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
> 23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
> 24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
> 25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
>> 26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
> 27. Shirts get dirty.. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
>> 28.. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?
>> 29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
>> 30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
>> 31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
>> 32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ash everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
>
I said Random!
Gizmom
http://www.gizmoangus.com
> 1. I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
> 2. Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.
> 3. I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.
> 4. There is great need for a sarcasm font.
> 5. How the heck are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
> 6. Was learning cursive really necessary?
> 7. Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.
> 8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
> 9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.
> 10. Bad decisions make good stories.
> 11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.
> 12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection.. .again.
> 13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.
> 14. "Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this - ever.
15. I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? Damn it!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voice mail. What did you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?
>> 16. I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.
>>17. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.
> 18. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.
> 19. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lite than Kay.
> What the heck happened to #20?!!
> 21. Sometimes, I'll watch a movie that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realize I had no idea what the heck was going on when I first saw it.
>> 22. I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.
> 23. The only time I look forward to a red light is when I'm trying to finish a text.
> 24. I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.
> 25. How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear or understand a word they said?
>> 26. I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars team up to prevent a dick from cutting in at the front. Stay strong, brothers and sisters!
> 27. Shirts get dirty.. Underwear gets dirty. Pants? Pants never get dirty, and you can wear them forever.
>> 28.. Is it just me or do high school kids get dumber & dumber every year?
>> 29. There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
>> 30. As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
>> 31. Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
>> 32. Even under ideal conditions people have trouble locating their car keys in a pocket, finding their cell phone, and Pinning the Tail on the Donkey - but I'd bet my ash everyone can find and push the snooze button from 3 feet away, in about 1.7 seconds, eyes closed, first time, every time!
>
I said Random!
Gizmom
http://www.gizmoangus.com
