ranchwife
Well-known member
RULES TO ENTER Montana
>
>The following list of rules applies to each person as they enter Montana.
>Learn 'em & remember 'em.
>
>1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
>2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road". I drive a pickup
>truck because I need to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get
>dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
>
>3. They are horses, cattle & oil wells. That's what they smell like to you.
>They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-90 and I-94 go
>east and west, I-15 goes north and south. Pick one.
>
>4. So you have a $60,000 dollar car. We're impressed. We have
>quarter-million dollar air conditioned tractors that we drive 3 weeks a
>year.
>
>5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's being friendly. Try to
>understand the concept.
>6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese are coming in, we WILL
>shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear
>at the time.
>
>7. Yeah, we eat Walleye & Rainbow Trout. You really want sushi & caviar?
>It's available at the corner bait shop.
>8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious
>holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.
>
>9. We open doors for women. That is applied to everyone, regardless of age.
>10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you
>can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
>
>11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
>vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and A-1
>
>12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, served over
>ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to
>shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
>
>13. High School Football is as important here as the Vikings and the
>Seattle Seahawks and a dang site more fun to watch.
>
>14. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the
>fish.
>15. Colleges? Try Montana State or the University of Montana. They come
>outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they
>still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
>
>16. We have more folks per capita in the Navy, Army, Marines, and Air Force
>than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Montana." If you do, it will get
>your ass kicked by the best.
>
had this e-mailed to me by a good friend and could not help but to post it!!! Give the "summer residents" something to read and , therefore, be warned!! :wink: :wink:
>
>The following list of rules applies to each person as they enter Montana.
>Learn 'em & remember 'em.
>
>1. Pull your droopy pants up. You look like an idiot.
>2. Let's get this straight; it's called a "gravel road". I drive a pickup
>truck because I need to. No matter how slow you drive, you're going to get
>dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get out of the way.
>
>3. They are horses, cattle & oil wells. That's what they smell like to you.
>They smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? I-90 and I-94 go
>east and west, I-15 goes north and south. Pick one.
>
>4. So you have a $60,000 dollar car. We're impressed. We have
>quarter-million dollar air conditioned tractors that we drive 3 weeks a
>year.
>
>5. So every person in every pickup waves. It's being friendly. Try to
>understand the concept.
>6. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of geese are coming in, we WILL
>shoot it out of your hand. You better hope you don't have it up to your ear
>at the time.
>
>7. Yeah, we eat Walleye & Rainbow Trout. You really want sushi & caviar?
>It's available at the corner bait shop.
>8. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season. It's a religious
>holiday held the closest Saturday to the first of November.
>
>9. We open doors for women. That is applied to everyone, regardless of age.
>10. No, there's no "vegetarian special" on the menu. Order steak. Or you
>can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2 pounds of ham & turkey.
>
>11. When we fill out a table, there are three main dishes: meats,
>vegetables, and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper, and A-1
>
>12. You bring "coke" into my house, it better be brown, wet, served over
>ice. You bring "Mary Jane" into my house, she better be cute, know how to
>shoot, drive a truck, and have long hair.
>
>13. High School Football is as important here as the Vikings and the
>Seattle Seahawks and a dang site more fun to watch.
>
>14. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit the water hazards - it spooks the
>fish.
>15. Colleges? Try Montana State or the University of Montana. They come
>outta there with an education plus a love for God and country, and they
>still wave at passing pickups when they come for the holidays.
>
>16. We have more folks per capita in the Navy, Army, Marines, and Air Force
>than any other state, so "Don't Mess with Montana." If you do, it will get
>your ass kicked by the best.
>
had this e-mailed to me by a good friend and could not help but to post it!!! Give the "summer residents" something to read and , therefore, be warned!! :wink: :wink: