burnt
Well-known member
Well even though we hate to admit it, the older we get, the more things change. My feet don't pick up as high and easy as they used to, my reflexes aren't as quick and it seems that I even think slower than I used to, if that is possible.
Yesterday in the calving pasture I found out how just how far my regression has progressed.
The baby I was tagging was right next to the bush fence so I snuck it away from its momma just under the fence into the edge of the trees and trussed it up to cut down on the kicking and struggling. (I learned that from Northern Rancher - thank you Cory!)
Well I didn't tie it up right and it started to kick out of its tie and back to momma it heads! Well, I got it back and tied it up right and went to get the tags and stuff from the 4wheeler. But by now, momma was getting a bit upset with the ongoings. She was always a big, gentle giant, my biggest cow(frame score of about 100, for those who care about such), but now the protective side was coming out. Strong.
I'm backing away toward the 4wheeler to grab the supplies bucket with her following me. Not madly bellowing or threatening, but right in my face. Not to worry, I thought, she won't try to hurt me.
This year we started out really dry but 3" of rain in the first week of May plus lots of heat makes for a lot of grass. Really tall, thick, grass.
So back to the cow. Not to worry, I thought, she won't try to hurt me. And that's when my feet tangled in the lush growth. I tripped over backwards in the long grass and lands on my back. Staring up into the cows face.
Talk about the perfect occasion for an involuntary evacuation of the bowels, to borrow James Herriot's phrase.
So she's about 12" from my face when I start to roll toward the fence about 8 feet away. Massive adrenalin rush plus overweight old guy still equals 1000 RPM's!!! I made it and she left to go back to her baby.
But when I stood up I realized that my glasses were gone and with all the long grass and dandelions it was plain to see that I was in trouble! :shock: :shock: :shock: I'm kinda lost without my specs.
So I knew about where I mighta lost them and I start doing the hand over hand feeling thing through the grass. Did you know that every dandelion stem looks like the arm of my glasses?
Hey, here they are! So I pull them out of the grass and try them on. Man, the world looks blurry. and they don't fit anymore, all twisted up. Must have cow poop on them.
They have a strange, cow-hoof shape to them. Could start a new fad - weird shaped glasses for that perfect, twisted outlook on life! So I clean them off and try to get them back into a wearable shape.
Try them on again and it's still blurry. So I look again and that's when I see that one lens is missing. That would explain the blurry! Oh man, that's bad news! These dang things cost me more than a calf is worth when I bought them a couple of years ago! :cry2:
There was no finding the lens in the long grass. It was plain to see that looking for it was a tough job for someone who had good vision let alone some half-blind, slow witted, stumble-footed old phart.
So I get the calf tagged and needled and de-flied, turn it back loose with momma and watch them amble out of sight. I head for the house at half throttle cuz I'm half blind! :lol2:
I got an appointment at the eye doctor this P.M. Until then, I can get by half good with my last set of specs. They sure make things look different since they are just single vision. Really gotta watch my step! Everything looks a half a step higher or lower than it really is.
And until my regular glasses come in, I'll maybe work on developing a little better perception of things . . . :roll:
Time to go check for new babies!
But I'll remember one thing for sure - tangling with a cross momma cow can really change how I see things! :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :wave:
Yesterday in the calving pasture I found out how just how far my regression has progressed.
The baby I was tagging was right next to the bush fence so I snuck it away from its momma just under the fence into the edge of the trees and trussed it up to cut down on the kicking and struggling. (I learned that from Northern Rancher - thank you Cory!)
Well I didn't tie it up right and it started to kick out of its tie and back to momma it heads! Well, I got it back and tied it up right and went to get the tags and stuff from the 4wheeler. But by now, momma was getting a bit upset with the ongoings. She was always a big, gentle giant, my biggest cow(frame score of about 100, for those who care about such), but now the protective side was coming out. Strong.
I'm backing away toward the 4wheeler to grab the supplies bucket with her following me. Not madly bellowing or threatening, but right in my face. Not to worry, I thought, she won't try to hurt me.
This year we started out really dry but 3" of rain in the first week of May plus lots of heat makes for a lot of grass. Really tall, thick, grass.
So back to the cow. Not to worry, I thought, she won't try to hurt me. And that's when my feet tangled in the lush growth. I tripped over backwards in the long grass and lands on my back. Staring up into the cows face.
Talk about the perfect occasion for an involuntary evacuation of the bowels, to borrow James Herriot's phrase.
So she's about 12" from my face when I start to roll toward the fence about 8 feet away. Massive adrenalin rush plus overweight old guy still equals 1000 RPM's!!! I made it and she left to go back to her baby.
But when I stood up I realized that my glasses were gone and with all the long grass and dandelions it was plain to see that I was in trouble! :shock: :shock: :shock: I'm kinda lost without my specs.
So I knew about where I mighta lost them and I start doing the hand over hand feeling thing through the grass. Did you know that every dandelion stem looks like the arm of my glasses?
Hey, here they are! So I pull them out of the grass and try them on. Man, the world looks blurry. and they don't fit anymore, all twisted up. Must have cow poop on them.
They have a strange, cow-hoof shape to them. Could start a new fad - weird shaped glasses for that perfect, twisted outlook on life! So I clean them off and try to get them back into a wearable shape.
Try them on again and it's still blurry. So I look again and that's when I see that one lens is missing. That would explain the blurry! Oh man, that's bad news! These dang things cost me more than a calf is worth when I bought them a couple of years ago! :cry2:
There was no finding the lens in the long grass. It was plain to see that looking for it was a tough job for someone who had good vision let alone some half-blind, slow witted, stumble-footed old phart.
So I get the calf tagged and needled and de-flied, turn it back loose with momma and watch them amble out of sight. I head for the house at half throttle cuz I'm half blind! :lol2:
I got an appointment at the eye doctor this P.M. Until then, I can get by half good with my last set of specs. They sure make things look different since they are just single vision. Really gotta watch my step! Everything looks a half a step higher or lower than it really is.
And until my regular glasses come in, I'll maybe work on developing a little better perception of things . . . :roll:
Time to go check for new babies!
But I'll remember one thing for sure - tangling with a cross momma cow can really change how I see things! :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :wave:
